Chapter 10
Aiden
“You sure this isn’t too awkward?”
“I’m sure. It’s just an arm, Evie.”
“Yeah, to you…”
I don’t let her know just how much I’m getting a kick out of this… This is probably the most intimate interaction we’ve had thus far. It was entirely her idea too.
Over breakfast Evie was going on about how she’s getting used to her new space on the desk and thanking me for my help. Meanwhile I’m just glad that she’s still here and settling in so well no less. Maybe it’s wrong, but I can’t help enjoying this fantasy-come-to-life situation.
And then she admitted to not feeling used to me. For a moment I was worried that I’d done something bad, until she clarified that she just still feels a bit intimidated by our size difference. Well… that’s understandable. I must still look like a monster to her. No amount of joking around about it is going to erase that.
She asked me if I wouldn’t mind just putting my hand up on the desk so that she could spend some time taking it in. My heart rate started picking up, but I was still more than happy to oblige…
And here we are. I’ve propped my entire forearm onto the table’s surface, my hand relaxing palm side up, and at first Evie’s just assessing, walking along the length of it, like a curious little mouse eyeing a potential hiding place. So cute. She’s halfway between wrist and elbow before she finally reaches out to touch me.
It’s probably just the anticipation of it that’s making my nerves oversensitive, but it feels like electricity where her skin meets mine. The hairs stand up on the back of my neck and I just try to hold really still. Her back’s to me so I don’t see her expression, but I imagine it’s one of fascination from the way she’s fixating the spot that she’s touching. She starts making her way up towards my hand, her tiny fingers trailing along my arm.
She’s getting close to the inside of my wrist when she pauses and puts both hands out now. “Whoa,” she says, and now I do get to see her face as she glances over her shoulder at me, “I can feel your pulse.”
If that’s the case, I hope she can’t tell how fast my heart is beating. Trying to play it cool, I quip back, "Well that’s handy. You can be my at-home nurse then– ahhh–” I try not to flinch as my whole arm lights up with goosebumps. She just brushed her fingers along the base of my palm. “Okay that tickles,” I say tightly.
“Sorry,” she laughs, pulling her hand away and continuing along.
Don’t be, I say only in my own mind, That felt really good…
I kinda wish I could explore her too. To maybe wrap my hand around her frame or carefully grasp a limb between my fingertips. To try and brush her hair back in order to gently touch her tiny face. But all of that seems way, way more invasive than what she’s doing to me. I don’t want to treat her like an actual doll. I thought I was having success at keeping these kinds of thoughts in check, but with Evie interacting with me like this it’s becoming very difficult to do so.
She reaches the ends of my fingers now and pushes against the third and fourth one while I let them hang loose, so that they curl in from the pressure of her minute muscles.
“What’s it like from your perspective?” she asks after she’s pulled the digits back out, and then she cautiously crawls right onto them.
Hoo boy. I want to be careful about how I answer this.
“It really is weird just how light you are,” I say, consciously flattening out my hand to give her an easier time clambering across the length of it. “At first I was so nervous about hurting you, you just seem so… fragile? No offense.”
“None taken,” she says, reaching my thumb now and using it to hoist herself back to the desk.
“My aunt has pet birds, though,” I continue, “and I got really used to handling them growing up when I’d go stay with her during the summer. If I can trim a finch’s nails I think we should be okay… At least your bones aren’t hollow. Mind if I try something?”
Evie looks up at me curiously and nods as a go-ahead. I tilt my hand upright and snake it around behind her, and then I very gently use my middle finger and thumb to pinch around the sides of her waist. I make sure to be careful about where I aim… All of her body parts are really close together and I don’t want to touch her anywhere inappropriate. I put on just enough pressure around her torso to lift her up, until her feet barely leave the floor. She lets out a little gasp, suddenly leaning forward to catch herself on the fingertips protruding from either side of her, but she doesn’t protest.
“Not too uncomfortable?” I ask before setting her back down.
“N-no…” she says, despite looking a little nervous. She takes a step back as I slowly slide my hand away again, and she’s looking from my fingers to my face, as if trying to put it together that I’m all one being. “In fact,” she adds, and her cheeks are reddening, “that might actually be better for when you have to carry me. Just something that feels more secure I guess? I’m always worried about falling.”
As if there was any universe where that would be an issue for me. “Okay, yeah. No problem.”
Her entire face is flushing now and she suddenly covers her eyes with her hands. “This is so weird!” she exclaims fervently.
I laugh and figure she might need a break from this exercise so I pull my arm back off the table. “It is very weird. You think this is helping you get used to it though?”
She pulls her hands off her face as she takes a deep breath, quickly regaining her composure. “It is. Thank you.”
“Any time.” God do I mean that.
I leave to run more errands after that, intent on finishing up Evie’s setup today. I’m out all morning, visiting a few different stores, being quite selective about the things on our list. I don’t find a mini fridge that’s even remotely the right size, unfortunately. And I’m realizing that most dolls are quite a bit bigger than three inches tall. But I otherwise do find success. At one point I get a spontaneous idea for something we hadn’t discussed that I might try to build this afternoon, so I stop at a craft store too.
Being at the pet shop is particularly strange. I’m just here to get her a water tank, though I figure I might as well look through the small animals section in case there’s anything useful. I briefly imagine her running around in a hamster ball, which makes me laugh to myself.
There’s a harness here with a leash - it’s clearly meant for rabbits or ferrets so it would be way too big for her anyway, but… something about it makes me shudder uncomfortably. I remember Dr. Little’s recounting of how he trained his victims to act a certain way. And I take a moment, right there in aisle 4, to firmly tell myself that I will never, ever treat her like an animal. No matter how small and cute and dependent she is. I can’t ever lose sight of the fact that she’s a person.
I come home to the bright, adorable smile of my little roommate, and the afternoon is spent unpacking and setting up everything that I bought. I’ve upgraded her measuring spoon to a small bowl for me to put fresh drinking water in, and Evie’s very excited about some of the miniature shelves and furniture I’ve found - I even came across a bed frame that fits her makeshift mattress.
She assures me she’ll pay me back for this stuff as soon as we get her debit card tomorrow amongst her other things. I secretly hope she forgets. She’s got enough on her plate as is, paying for this stuff is the least I can do.
I go fill up the water tank, which is just the right height for her to easily scoop out of with her toothpaste-cap-buckets, perfect for filling a bathtub. Speaking of which - I bring over a longer charging cable to set up the mug warmer and a small dish that she can use to bathe in. It’s a USB-powered warmer that’s just meant for office use, so it doesn’t get excessively warm, and the dish completely covers the hot plate, so it should all be quite safe. Plus she’s able to operate it independently… It’s all coming together.
She has a section on the corner of the desk that is quickly becoming the bathroom area, and I take some quick measurements of it with a ruler. Then I set to work, using the ottoman as a table and pulling out the white plastic sheets I got at the craft store.
“What are you working on?” Evie calls out from the desk, tilting her head to the side as she watches me.
“You’ll see,” I say with a smile, “I don’t want to promise anything in case it doesn’t work out.”
We spend a little while in comfortable silence as I measure, cut and glue the plastic while she starts putting things on shelves, her industrious nature manifesting again as she organizes everything meticulously. Early evening is approaching when I finally finish my project.
It just looks like a box, about five inches tall and over twice that in length. The roof is a series of many very thin criss-crossing plastic strips, meant to obscure view but still be able to vent. One of the walls has a wide doorway, and another one has a hole just big enough to string a power cable through.
“Let’s see if this works…” I say, softly interrupting Evie’s endeavors.
She glances up as I approach the desk, and her brow furrows with a mix of confusion and interest. I take the mug warmer with its ceramic dish and put it inside the box, orienting it so that the doorway is facing the side wall of the apartment and is out of sight, and then I place the entire structure right next to the water tank and metal toilet box for easy access.
“Thought you could use some privacy,” I say, standing back up to admire my handiwork. “At first I thought about using a shoebox, but then not only would it be dark in there but I figured all of the evaporation from the bath would make the cardboard soggy. What do you think?”
Evie enters her new bathroom excitedly, and while I can see a little bit of movement through the roof vent, I can’t tell what she’s doing.
“Can you see me?” I hear her voice yell.
“No, not really. That’s kind of the point,” I say with a laugh.
“Thank you so much, Aiden,” she looks almost emotional as she comes back out to meet me, “This is so thoughtful.”
“I’m glad you like it! I won’t ever go in there unless it’s to dump out the water bowl, so just let me know whenever it’s okay to do that."
“Sounds good.”
“Maybe at some point we’ll figure out how to make you a kitchen. Hell, I wish we could get you your own mini grocery store. It’d probably fit in the living room.”
She laughs, and I can’t get enough of its near musical sound. “I think I have more than enough up here.”
“Yeah, unfortunately you’re still stuck with my cooking. Any requests for your celebratory welcome dinner?”
“Hmm. What are the other meals you said you’re good at?”
“Well it’s pretty hard to screw up fried rice. And I learned to make homemade pesto sauce once, so I’m not bad at pasta. That takes a while, though.”
“Fried rice it is then!”
This works out since I have a lot of vegetables I need to use up. I make a large batch of it and I’m excited to get to use Evie’s new dollhouse plates. Like almost everything else, they’ll be a little big for her, but it’s better than her having to crouch over a giant spoon. I carefully place her portion on her shrunken table and we’re both able to sit in a chair this time as we eat.
Since at this point we’re done with any work we can think of, I suggest watching a movie to relax for the evening. I actually don’t own a TV, just watch everything on my laptop, but I think that’s better suited for my little friend anyway.
“So what kind of stuff do you normally like to watch?” I ask, offering her my hand to climb onto.
“Umm… I watch a lot of nature documentaries…” she says, settling onto me, “It’s a bit embarrassing, but a lot of cartoons too. I’m really into animation.”
I remember to loosely close my fingers around her this time, giving her something to hold onto, and I’m trying not to look too excited about having another excuse to hold her in my hand like this. Still, I offer her a smile as I lift her up. “Don’t be embarrassed. I’ve just gotten into anime pretty recently, so if that counts then I’m right there with you.”
Evie clings to my ring finger and looks up at me eagerly. “Yeah, it counts! Gosh, I haven’t watched anime in years. My best friend growing up showed me so much of it, that was her big obsession. What’s your favorite show so far?”
“So, one thing you have to know about me…" I say, sitting down on the couch as I continue holding her aloft, "is that I really love camping. I usually try to get out in nature for a couple of days once or twice a year. Last year was particularly busy for me school-wise, and I didn’t get to go. Sooo, what’s the next best thing? Watching cutesy anime girls camping instead, apparently. There’s my long-winded explanation for why I love Laid Back Camp. Even though I’m probably not the target demographic… It’s just so relaxing and a really nice escape for when I have a lot going on.”
“I’ve never heard of it. But a relaxing escape sounds really nice right now… Um, if you’re okay watching something you’ve already seen.”
“I don’t mind at all, I’d love to introduce you to it!” I set Evie down next to me on the couch and reach out to the laptop to pull up the show.
Our setup is rather comical. Like a kid who’s pretending to watch TV with his favorite action figure. I have to be mindful not to shift around too much - it’s not like she’s right up against me, but I still don’t want to jostle her.
We’re about halfway through the episode when I notice her small figure out of the corner of my eye, shifting closer to me. I think she’s trying to be sneaky about it… which might objectively not be the smartest thing if it could lead to me accidentally knocking into her. But I also feel touched that she trusts me to be careful. I wonder what she’s up to…
Evie comes very close to my leg, and I abruptly realize what she’s looking for - body warmth. She’s shivering.
Any normal person would have offered her a blanket. Or I should have at least gone and updated the thermostat. But instead, my gut reaction is to lay my hand down next to her on the couch. She jumps at the sudden movement and looks straight up at me.
“You cold?” I ask quietly, and I gently nudge her with my pinkie. For a second I think she’s going to decline and feel incredibly stupid for not offering her something other than myself to stay warm. But then she silently crawls onto my hand, huddling against my fingers as I curl them around her. And bit by bit her muscles relax as her shivering goes away.
“Thanks,” she finally says, giving my thumb a grateful pat as she readjusts herself on my palm for the long haul. “This helps.”
I have a really hard time paying attention to the show after that.