by Ernie Centofanti (aka Pacific1982)
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Posts made by Olo
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RE: worthless
What a fucking bastard.
I really like how you hint at the (pre-shrinking) history between Andrew and Nia without giving us more than we need to know. Similarly, we get to imagine for ourselves the range of tortures and humiliations he inflicted upon her, which of course makes them worse.
“Before you always looked down on everyone…so we made it so you could never do it again…"
That “we” is highly intriguing…
On a technical note, I wonder if the narrative might flow better if all the action was in the past tense rather than the present. This could easily be just a matter of taste, but to me it would feel more organic and less like, say, the transcript of a roleplaying session. YMMV.
Also, “you’re” instead of “your.”
But yeah, he really played her desperation like a fiddle, and it was delicious.
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RE: Petrichor - a novel in "open beta" - [M/f, minigiant, post-apocalyptic dystopia, slavery, military setting]
@kisupure said in Petrichor - a novel in "open beta" - [M/f, minigiant, post-apocalyptic dystopia, slavery, military setting]:
What was he doing? His words were plain, but they were slippery, muddy, hiding things. Is this how he talked to Finch for a whole week? He made this seem so strangely urgent, like she was running out of time.
Like the pheromone, she can detect the foreboding but she cannot see the cause.
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SW Randomness
So, hey, this is still functional.
Master
TouristAge: 36
Victim
SecretaryAge: 30
Race: Caucasian
Hair color: black
Hair style: long twin tails
New size: 3"
cause for shrinking: shrink potion in bath water
Duration
Ten yearsStorage of the SW when not in use
in a bird cageClothes
doll dressSpecial
SW will be abused in public
SW has to help capture and shrink other womenThings master will do frequently
feel SW up
spank SW with a ruler
improvise bondage
lick SWServices the SW has to perform
act as living remote controlThe End
SW escapes