Depression and Size Kink
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@i-am-insane said in Depression and Size Kink:
The relationship itself has a sort of expectation, even if it’s unstated, that at some point you will talk about this kind of thing, to be open and honest.
What you wrote is so very true, and yet that’s something I still struggle with. I have a hard time opening up and trusting, I always focus on the negative outcomes of any situations, and it’s very hard for me to allow myself to be vulnerable with someone. Admitting this kink is then basically impossible.
A long road ahead for me.
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@foreverlurk
I mean, that was more a broad statement, from that point you have to get more specific; for example, how serious is the relationship? Because for obvious reasons you’re probably not going to tell your new girlfriend or whatever your long held secret fetish, for example? Then you get to questions like, has she told you of something like that, is your relationship strong in that kind of way, and so on and so forth.(Are you even in a relationship? They way you’re phrasing it now makes it sound like you are.)
To be blunt? It’s not a one size fits all kind of situation, is the thing. I’m pretty sure if you checked, there’d be a lot of people on this forum who aren’t totally open about this kind of thing, and… that’s OK? Your relationship is your relationship, not anyone else’s, and it should go at whatever pace you and your partner are comfortable with, not whatever pace is ‘normal’. Normal is honestly kind of a toxic fucking lie, in my opinion, and it messes a lot of people up because it makes so many people go, ‘But I’m not doing it like everyone else!’ when everyone else does it their own personal way, as well.
Don’t try and force it, that’s not going to help. If you’re not ready, it’ll stress you out, mess you up, which would probably get noticed and responded to by your partner (if you don’t end up taking it out on them to some extent, since, you know, people are universally known to be more angry/withdrawn when stressed out, which is great for healthy communication! /s), plus, you may be right in that your relationship isn’t ready. Maybe it’s too early or something. How the fuck would I know if it’s ready or not? I’m not you, I don’t live your life, I’m in no position to tell you when and if that time is, you are.
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@foreverlurk Thanks, I sadly live in place that has banned big pets indoors and considered a hamster/guinea pig but I dunno if that is me.
I’ve walked the fine line of depression for most my life, I only admitted this kink for 2 of my GFs, both thought it was cute but sadly, one was a long distance and one moved away.
Right now, I’m exhausted, hating myself and just done with things.
