@foreverlurk Thanks, I sadly live in place that has banned big pets indoors and considered a hamster/guinea pig but I dunno if that is me.
I’ve walked the fine line of depression for most my life, I only admitted this kink for 2 of my GFs, both thought it was cute but sadly, one was a long distance and one moved away.
Right now, I’m exhausted, hating myself and just done with things.