It’s one thing to reconcile your non-con and other unsavory fantasies in your own mind, but it’s something entirely different when you set about sharing and discussing your fantasies with others, let alone creating imagery or stories featuring those elements. I quite sympathize. It’s been almost nine years since I first wrote a size fantasy story with the intent of publishing it for others to read, there were decades of feelings isolated and perverted before that, and I still struggle with it sometimes.
Even now, when I write about non-con and fatal vore, I pause to worry about what kind of ideas or messages I might be putting out into the universe. Aren’t women sexually-objectified enough in our society? Are they then nothing but toys or food to me? I’m also a bit nervous of exposing shameful parts of myself. What kind of self-respecting man has to put a woman literally under his thumb?
Given the nature of porn and online communities, it is all-too-easy to get the impression that kink spaces are pure sausage fests, and far too many dudes appoint themselves gatekeepers and try to impose their own views on any women that voice their opinions. This is tragic, as what kinksters need more than anything else is the validation that only comes with a diversity of experiences.
I only started to feel better about myself and my desires after listening to others with similar desires share their thoughts and feelings. Specifically, I am deeply grateful to Jit and all the other female size fantasists who have expressed how powerful their size desires are, from the most sweetly romantic to the most depravedly cruel, taking the roles of both predators and prey.
Everyone comes to size fantasy by a different path. Many of us are indeed working out “issues,” but the meanings you discover in or assign to your fantasies is wholly within your control. There’s nothing wrong with exorcising your bitterness or heartbreak through dark fantasies, and there’s nothing to be ashamed of enjoying dark fantasies without having a traumatic “cause” for them.
The important thing to remember is that your mind is an immense place, full of things wondrous strange, and you are so much more than any of them.
