Chapter 59
Evie
I use two hands to expand the map that I’m looking at on my phone. I’m trying to move quickly. It’s Friday morning and Aiden only has to work an hour of lab credit before he’s done with his job for the day, so he should be back by 10am.
I’ve been staying particularly busy this week. It’s in part to keep my mind distracted after what happened at the dinner party this past weekend, but then I started truly enjoying myself once I got the idea to plan this little outing today. I know where we’re going and what we’re doing there for the most part… but I still haven’t fully decided on where we should go for lunch. I’m running out of time.
Out of desperation, I open up my messaging app and tap on Diego’s name. He and I have been texting quite a bit, actually. It started out with him becoming my virtual physical therapist to help my leg heal, but eventually we started discussing nutrition and exercise in general, and he’s now well on his way to becoming a personal trainer instead. I’m sure if I was my old size he would have already dragged me to the gym by now.
I type a message to him with the hope of getting his help.
E : Hey hey hey Kong
D : Heyheyheyhey Shrimp
E : Do you know if Aiden likes poutine?
D : No clue
D : Wtf is poutine
E : Don’t worry about it
D : Oh I just googled it, that looks amazing
D : Omg are you planning your date right now???
E : Ah he told you about that?
D : Shit
D : NO I don’t know what you’re talking about
D : But okay, if you’re looking at the poutine truck that’s about 10 miles north of you, I will mention that he’s shown interest in checking out that entire food truck area… for what it’s worth ; )
E : Ok thanks!
E : Also I don’t care that you know, Diego. Wish me luck
D : Good luck!!!
Alright. That settles it. Everything’s fully planned now. I just need to wait for my boyfriend to get home.
I go sit down against my stuffed lion with a sigh, eyes glazing over as I run my fingers through its fur. I haven’t really paused to breathe much at all these days. It’s not in a bad way… Well, hopefully. I’m still not always fully in touch with my feelings, my learned tendency being to push away anything that’s painful. I force myself to close my eyes and take a few quiet breaths, seeing if anything comes up.
Sure enough, there’s anxiety simmering at the base of my stomach. Part of it might just be the nerves of having planned this date today and hoping it all goes well. But I also see a flash in my mind, the image of a person… The latest of my too-many acquaintances. Obviously I’m not over the frightening first encounter I had with Camila, almost a week ago now. I’ve thought about it a lot, and Aiden and I have discussed it on multiple occasions. He’s helped me process the fear of that night and has reassured me that she’s not a threat.
But that’s not quite where the anxiety’s coming from right now. The flash in my mind was not of Camila’s face glaring at me, but specifically her hand. The view that I had from within Aiden’s pocket, the feminine fingertips gently tugging at his collar. The memory feels like an icy claw around my heart.
I’m snapped out of my thoughts by the door opening and I hop to my feet, happy to take a break from the ruminating. My giant partner slips inside and looks particularly cheerful as he sends me a wave. He sets his bag on the counter and then hesitates before settling in any further.
“Should I keep my shoes on?” he calls, “Were you ready to head out right now?”
I know he can’t hear me from across the room, but this wouldn’t be the first time - I hold one hand high with a thumbs-up so that he can see my tiny figure lengthen out, our go-to nonverbal signal for “yes.” With that he makes a beeline to where I am, all smiles as he leans down and scoops me up.
"So what’s the plan then?” Aiden asks with anticipation, pausing only to plant a kiss on my neck and shoulder. His warmth has completely thawed away my anxieties, and I giggle as I give him a brief peck in return.
“Real quick,” I say, pointing towards the desk below, “Can you bring my phone and that little box with you? And then I’ll be your pocket GPS.”
“Oh, so we’re driving somewhere?”
“Yup. I wonder if you’ll figure it out on the way.”
“Let’s find out!"
And with that we’re off on our adventure. He does catch on that we’re probably going to do some sort of nature hike based on the roads I lead him to, but he has no idea where we are once we pull into the parking lot twenty minutes later. He steps out of the car and I stay in his pocket, taking furtive looks around so that I can direct him further. There’s a clearing ahead of us - a massive field to me - with a children’s playground and a wooded area in the distance. There’s a bit of a crowd since it’s so nice out, so I point out the general direction for him to go and then duck out of sight.
Aiden manages to cross the clearing and move past the many families without issue. Once we’re beyond the playground, the herd of titans begins to thin as voices gradually recede into the distance. I figure the coast is a bit more clear when I hear a whisper above me, “So what is this place? A park I guess?”
“Yeah, I think there’s some walking trails if you want to check those out too,” I respond, taking a quick glance over the lip of the pocket. “But just past those trees, can you hear that?”
The giant pauses from walking so that he can listen. “A stream?”
“Uh huh. And it runs right next to an old rock quarry.”
“Whoa, seriously?” he says, immediately lighting up at the mention of anything geological. He starts making his way down an unmarked path that winds through the grove, heading towards the sounds of rushing water. “How do I not know about this place?”
I grin to myself. I’d mostly expected that he had heard about it through school or work, but I’m really glad that he hasn’t. “It just opened to the public last week,” I explain, “But I honestly wasn’t sure if you’d already been here somehow…”
“Nope! What a great surpri– oh.”
Aiden steps out into an open area only to stop abruptly and lose track of his words. Now that he’s crossed through the patch of trees, the din of other voices has all but vanished. There’s only the gurgling sound of the nearby brook, so I tentatively poke my head out and sure enough, no one’s around this area. Instead I see a wide clearing, framed by the trees on one side, and by the stream running alongside a tall cliff on the other side - the quarry in question. But that’s not quite what I brought him here for.
Scattered throughout the clearing are a wide variety of bulky rock structures. It looks almost like a little outdoor museum, with some areas dedicated to carved statues, others displaying various cross sections of geological formations. There are signs everywhere that explain what the different mini-exhibits are, and occasional larger placards contain mounted sets of much smaller samples of crystals and minerals. The website called this an “educational rock garden.” Even to me it looks really cool.
“Oh no…” Aiden mutters.
“What?” I say, looking up at him with concern.
“You’re going to be so bored. I have to look at all this stuff.”
I grin again as I feel the underlying excitement in his voice. His whole body’s practically buzzing with anticipation and it fills me with joy.
“Babe, that’s exactly what I brought you here to do!” I gush, “Let’s go explore! Tell me what I’m looking at, I’m excited to learn about it all.”
“Ahhh, okay… Man, where to start… Oh, you see this sample right here? This is columnar jointing. It’s the coolest thing, this was formed by a lava flow. See how the cross section is a hexagon? That happened because of the way the lava cracked when it cooled…”
We start winding our way throughout the clearing, and even though I’m only half following what Aiden is saying most of the time, I’m thoroughly enjoying listening to him talk about his passions. For whatever reason there aren’t any other rock connoisseurs out here at all, so eventually we take the risk of me coming out of his pocket so that he can hold me and give me a better look at this stuff. For the next hour and a half I’m either sitting in his hands or on his shoulder as we examine everything from agatized coral to limestone extractions from this very quarry to a miniature solar system carved out of marble.
Once we’ve made our way through everything, we find a spot near the stream to sit and relax for a bit. I want to be careful about not falling into what is more like a raging river to me, but there’s a quiet nook where the water forms a shallow enough pool that I can walk around in without issue. Aiden’s rambling to me about a time he visited a cavern, and I make him promise to take me with him the next time he goes spelunking.
“You definitely picked the right major,” I laugh, kicking some water his way. I only manage to splash the edge of his wrist, and he doesn’t flinch, smiling down at me as he leans overhead. He flicks some water in my direction and I giggle as the droplets rain down right in front of me.
“I can talk about this stuff forever," he says, "You sick of it yet?”
“Nope.”
I wander to the edge of the pool and start looking around at my surroundings. We’ve been looking at all sorts of fancy geological samples, but I’m now taking greater notice of all the pebbles and boulders that litter my immediate vicinity. I start wondering about these more mundane specimens.
“So can you identify any rock just by looking at it?” I ask.
“Not any rock. But probably quite a few.”
“Alright… what’s that one?” I point to a thin, jagged stone that’s sticking out of the dirt several inches away.
Aiden glances over and his answer is immediate. “That’s a type of shale. Makes sense for the area we’re in. This probably used to be a bigger river once upon a time and sediments got deposited down here.”
I nod and then look for the next rock, eyes scanning the ground. I see something glinting on the shore and hurry over to hoist it up. It’s heavy and about the size of a football to me. “What about this?” I ask, marveling at the yellow-orange sheen. “Whoa, this looks like some kind of crystal!”
“Yeah, this… I don’t think it’s meant to be here.” Giant fingers approach to gently pinch the shard out of my hands, and he lifts it to his face so he can squint at it. “Yeah, it’s not amber… I think it might be citrine? My guess is that it probably ended up here with the rest of the imported stuff from the rock garden.”
Enjoying this game, I skitter over to the other side of the pool. “What about this one?” I chirp, pointing to a veritable hill of gray from my perspective.
Aiden snort-laughs. “That’s a chunk of concrete.”
I do a double take, looking back at the hulking rock. Oh. Yeah, I probably could have identified that one too.
Once we’ve hung out and enjoyed the stream for a little bit, we decide to check out one of the walking trails since it’s still too early for lunch.
My partner plucks me right out of the water and brings me to the hem of his shirt to help dry my legs off against the cloth. Before he gets to his feet I ask him to take out my phone so that I can reveal the next thing I had planned. I perch on his wrist as he holds the device and lets me navigate the menus on the screen.
“So I had Moira’s help on this part, I hope I got the right thing…” I say as I click, “You know the latest Brandon Sanderson book?”
“…Yes?”
“You haven’t read it yet, right?”
“No, I didn’t preorder this time.”
“Want to listen to the audiobook with me?” I pull up the book that I bought ahead of time on the phone and turn to grin up at my boyfriend excitedly.
He laughs, and the subtle shake of it makes him bring a hand up to ensure I stay stable on his arm. “What is this?” he asks, “Aiden’s-favorite-things day?”
“That’s absolutely what this is! I know I’m not the biggest reader, and I can’t promise I’ll get into it. But I’d love to try, and I think I’d have an easier time with the audio format. We can listen on the hike! Sound okay?”
With a grin he lifts me up to his face to nuzzle into me before depositing me by his neck. “Sounds perfect.”
Soon I’m laying down on Aiden’s shoulder, having slipped under the collar of his shirt so that I’m mostly hidden from view. He’s put in headphones and I’m holding on to one earbud like it’s a teddy bear, the sound of the narration more than loud enough for me even though it’s not right up to my ear. We stay among the trees, opting for the shaded walking paths, and despite me having to duck my head out of sight from time to time as we run into passerby, it’s such a nice time.
The book itself was definitely something that I picked out for his sake, but I’m finding myself getting sucked into the story more than I thought I would. It’s not that I think we need to have everything in common, but I’m finding it fun to take an interest in the stuff he likes. I’m so warm and comfortable from being bundled up against my giant’s skin that I start feeling a little sleepy, but the way his body shifts as he walks keeps me on alert since I constantly need to maintain my balance.
After about half an hour or so, I’m roused into a sitting position when Aiden silently runs a finger along my side to get my attention. He points at a nearby bench and table that’s alongside a patch of wildflowers, and it’s just tucked enough into the treeline that it seems like the perfect spot to take a break. I nod in agreement before he heads in that direction.
“Are you getting hungry or anything?” he asks as he softly sets me down onto the table. “I could go either way.”
“I’m still okay,” I respond, stretching my arms over my head and taking a few steps across the wood. “I do have lunch options planned, though, if you want to start heading back soon? Oh! In the meantime… How does dessert first sound?”
“What do you mean?” Aiden asks, crossing his arms on the table as he watches me. He’s clearly getting such a kick out of all the little things I’ve planned out today.
“You still have that box I told you to bring?”
He produces the little container from his shorts pocket and opens it up curiously. Inside is a small, lumpy ball, not much bigger than a grape to him. Over the past week, every time I was on the kitchen counter I began smuggling over some ingredients to store in my own mini fridge bit by bit, focusing on a flavor combo that I’ve noticed is one of Aiden’s favorites - peanut butter and chocolate. This morning I mixed the nut butter, oats, and chocolate chips together with some honey to make a truffle-like treat. The giant stares into the box for a few seconds before setting it down on the table.
“How did I get so lucky?” he mutters, and he takes a quick look around to check that the coast is clear. Then he slides his arms onto the table to circle around me and brings his head all the way down to where I’m standing. He kisses the side of my body, his lips moving against me as he whispers, “Thanks for all of this, sweet girl. I’ve been having such a good time with you today.”
We kiss in earnest then, and I happily drown in my boyfriend’s body as he simulates a tight hug by coiling his arms in closer. A couple of minutes pass as we cuddle, and it’s only when he pulls his mouth away that I realize I’ve been pushed snugly into the crook of his elbow. Being tiny can be really disorienting.
I use the narrow space between forearm and bicep to shimmy my way up until I’m sitting on the elbow itself. “Planning this stuff was fun for me!” I finally respond, a bit out of breath, “It’s the least I can do as your girlfriend.”
Aiden lays the side of his head on the table and moves his free hand behind me, carefully rubbing at the back of my head with his fingertips. “I don’t think you realize how special you are,” he says, holding my gaze adoringly. “You’re so thoughtful - and you pay attention to my likes and dislikes more than anyone I’ve known. More than any other girlfriend I’ve had, that’s for sure.”
I stiffen. There’s a sudden cold feeling in my chest that takes me aback for a second. My anxiety from earlier this morning has returned in an instant, and I debate internally about how I should handle these unwelcome emotions… I don’t want to ruin the moment, but I also know that if I don’t address this it’s going to continue to weigh on me.
“Oh really?” I respond, trying to sound nonchalant. “I guess we haven’t talked much about your past relationships. You know about my exes, um… is it okay if I know about yours?”
My partner seems to clock the subtle shift in my behavior and lifts his face back up to look more alert. He stops touching me with his free hand and uses it to support his head instead.
“Yeah, sure,” he says, “There’s not all that much to tell. Let’s see… I had a couple of quote-unquote ‘girlfriends’ in grade school that honestly didn’t really mean much, none of them lasted for more than a few months. And then I had one long-term relationship during my undergrad. That one lasted a little over two years.”
I nod, absently kicking my legs that are dangling over the edge of his arm. I look skywards, summoning a relevant memory from a few days ago. “At the dinner party, Star mentioned that you had her going with the last girlfriend. Something about thinking you’d end up with someone short?”
Aiden chuckles. “Yeah, just ‘cause my ex was pretty tall. Almost as tall as me, actually.”
“Gotcha,” I say with a smirk, and I joke, “Is that why it didn’t work out? You realized you preferred a girlfriend that could only be measured in inches?”
“Ha. No. Although come to think of it, none of my exes were particularly short. You definitely take the cake.”
I squirm quietly for a second before asking, “Mind if I ask why it actually didn’t work out?”
The giant’s eyes unfocus and then stare out past me as he revisits a time from years ago. “Mmmm, to be perfectly honest… I think we both just saw each other as little more than friends. I mean, it was exciting at first. But in retrospect, once we actually became a couple, there wasn’t that deep of a connection. We just sorta stayed together because it was convenient and we got along fine. She was a year older than me so she graduated first, and when she got a job on the other side of the country we mutually decided we didn’t want to do long distance… and that was that. I’m glad it wasn’t a big, messy breakup or anything, but it is a little weird that I dated her for as long as I did.”
The cold claw squeezing my heart tightens as I finally summon the courage to come out and say it. “If she’s older than you then… I’m guessing her name wasn’t Camila?”
A look of shock passes over Aiden’s face. He lifts his head off his hand, raising back up to a normal sitting position as he frowns and says, “No. Nonononono, I never dated Camila. Oh god, have you been worrying about that?”
“Not… excessively,” I assure him, although despite myself I’m feeling something unclench inside of me. “Just from what I was hearing from inside your pocket that night, I had a bit of a weird feeling about it. Maybe I’m wrong, but it really felt like she was coming on to you.”
“Um, no, you’re… spot on, actually.” Aiden sighs. “So, uh… sorry, I probably should have mentioned this before, but… Camila did tell me she had feelings for me, a couple of years ago. It was really weird, we were never that close and she had only just moved out here, so it felt like it came out of nowhere. I told her that sorry, but I don’t see her that way, and she backed off after that. We’ve just stayed casual friends since then, if that - before the dinner party I hadn’t seen her in, like, half a year. But I agree, she… uh… wasn’t exactly being subtle the other night.”
I nod thoughtfully. I can’t deny that I feel relieved about the fact that he never shared a deep connection with her. But regardless of how he feels, I don’t think I’m out of the woods quite yet. Unrequited feelings can get really messy. And the situation was already pretty messy to start with. I shakily get to my feet and start padding my way down the length of his forearm, deep in thought.
“Maybe you shouldn’t have introduced me as your girlfriend right off the bat,” I finally say.
Aiden’s gaze drops to the ground. “Yeah, I think you’re right. I was trying to… humanize you, I guess. To really emphasize the fact that you’re just like the rest of us. But that was probably the wrong move in the moment.” He lets out a frustrated groan. “It doesn’t make any sense, I seriously have no idea why she’s at all interested. I’ve known her for forever, we’ve always gotten along fine, but I’ve only ever seen her as a family friend. She was just ‘Diego’s cousin’ to me. We have nothing in common.”
I look up at him with a helpless shrug. “You’re really good looking. And you’re literally the kindest man I’ve ever met. It could be that she looked up to you as a kid and then those feelings eventually matured.” I pivot and start walking in the other direction on his arm. “Though maybe I’m not the right person to ask. I don’t understand how anyone could not fall for you.”
The universe finds it very funny for me to lose my balance right as I say that. I throw my arms out in an effort to regain myself, and I would have jumped right off his arm, but his reflexes are quick and his hand darts just behind my body to catch me. The instant I realize that, I let myself fall into his cupped palm. Aiden takes the opportunity to lift me right up to his face.
"Don’t worry,” he murmurs, snuggling into me, “There’s zero interest there on my part.”
From this proximity I can let my voice be soft. "Thanks. I think I needed to hear that…” I lean into the space where his nose meets his cheek, closing my eyes. My voice hitches and I press myself further against him as I add, “Sorry, I don’t mean to get jealous. That’s not a very attractive quality.”
"No, you’re fine! It’s okay to feel insecure, I appreciate you telling me. Whenever you need it, I’m always happy to reassure you that I only have eyes for you.”
We hear voices just then, my partner growing quiet and still as he keeps me out of view, and so we hold the embrace for several long moments. Having to hide all the time is usually annoying and nerve-wracking, but sometimes the forced extended proximity can be really nice. Once the two passerby have come and gone, I straighten back up and Aiden gives us some space, holding me out in front of him.
“Since we’re on the subject of Camila…” he says slowly, “Maybe now’s as good a time as any to bring this up…”
He tells me about the fact that he’s planning to meet up with Camila and Diego in two days, and that there’s an open invitation for me to join. To my own surprise, I’m not immediately freaked out by this and hear him out without protest. He doesn’t pressure me in any way, and after we discuss it for a little bit and go through the pros and cons, I finally come to a conclusion.
“I think Diego’s right,” I say, “I should probably meet with her at some point, if she’s okay talking to me this time… I’d like to give it another chance.” I set my jaw, summoning my own determination. “I’ve spent so much of my life running away from things. I want to try and face this head on. Who knows, now that she knows what to expect, maybe we’ll hit it off… I’d at least like to be on her good side if I’m able.”
Neither one of us is completely convinced that this is right. Especially if Camila sees me as the one who took her crush off the dating market. But Aiden nods in agreement, smiling at how resolute I am. “Alright. You’ve got my full support, and I know Diego will have your back too. I’ll let them know that we’re in.”
And with that he finally picks up the peanut butter ball from its tiny box, and he extends it towards me so that I can take a crumb of it off for myself. Then he pops it into his mouth and sighs with pleasure.
“Hey…” he says as I nibble at my own portion, “Can we do an Evie’s-favorite-things day soon?”
I grin, overflowing with affection, and chirp, “Deal!”
