@skysayl said in I found a crumb of M/f in a manga:
I’m glad you seem to have found a way to banish that shame.
Thanks. It took a long while, and there’s a sympathetic twinge every time I see someone else struggling with shame.
At least, I assume you have because every comment I’ve seen from you has been level-headed and emotionally intelligent.
Oh dear. I need to start posting while drunk more.
@skysayl said:
Did you ever feel like the shame was a result of your fantasy being at odds with your own sense of integrity? The way you’ve worded it, it sounds like there was a belief there that responsibility was synonymous with control.
I believed responsibility was synonymous with adulthood, and I felt I was shirking it by not launching a career or doing any of the other things that were expected of me. If anything, my fantasy was too aligned with my sense of self, such that it was a tempting distraction from getting my shit together. For a while I entertained the possibility that I would have to abandon size fantasy if I were to ever “grow up.”
@miss-lillipants said:
For me, the idea of a giant being in control is a comforting thing - not because I don’t want control of my life, but because being an adult is exhausting!
When I was feeling ashamed of my shrunken man fantasies, one way I would beat myself up was to tell myself that it was an infantilizing fantasy driven by my reluctance to take responsibility for my life. It took a very long time to give myself permission to take the occasional vacation from adulthood.
Then I had to learn how to give myself permission to enjoy taking control of shrunken women…
@miss-lillipants said:
“Different people have different reasons for being involved in the fetish or lifestyle.”
This is crucially important to remember, particularly to people just now discovering their fetish and assuming everyone online must be into it for the same reason. I made this mistake for many years before I started listening to others.
@foreverlurk said:
The desire to protect (or control ) is harder to pinpoint - I always loved taking care of smaller animals, or looking after my younger siblings.
Back when I hung out on Tumblr, there was a user (Tiny-Taker, if anyone else remembers) who had what they described as a “rescue fetish.” They really enjoyed the idea of taking care of tiny people and protecting them from a hostile world. Tiny-Taker was also under no illusions about the power aspect of their fantasies.
@i-am-insane You could replace “horror” in that meme with “comedy.”
@blehb One thing I can never be sure of in manga is what age the characters are supposed to be.
@protect-tinies said:
A lot of the traditional ways for men to act macho and superior have fallen out of favor over time and have been widely labeled “toxic,” so the traditional ways are slowly being replaced by new ways.
