Disaster and confrontation

[littlest-lily]

@protect-tinies Well I certainly love the way you think. Maybe a little extreme for anyone dealing with trauma, but I sure would sign up willingly~

[skysayl]

I actually have something on my docs along these lines, but it’s been very hard to write because it started as a therapeutic piece for myself. Sort of a hurt and comfort dynamic except I take the ugly, raw parts and have turned them up to mirror my own experiences with trauma therapy. I’m talking full on breaks in the presence of a professional, verbal abuse, avoidance, SI, the nine yards. Except the therapist is a giant, and therefore the source for a lot of triggering moments.

I can’t imagine anyone wants to read that, so it’s a private doc. I thought that maybe if I were to trim out a lot of the intenseness and zero in on a more optimistic narrative it could be palatable. But if I did that I felt the context would be neutered and it just wouldn’t… work.

Seriously though, what is the appetite for trauma-genre? The discourse here is making me wonder if it would be worth putting it out there someday.

[blehb]

@skysayl said in Disaster and confrontation:

Seriously though, what is the appetite for trauma-genre? The discourse here is making me wonder if it would be worth putting it out there someday.

I think a lot of people would be interested, myself included. As long as it has the proper warnings and tags I don’t believe there would be an issue.

I think a lot of us have used this fantasy to cope with the various obstacles in life. I personally have a lot of story ideas that are on the heavier side.

But just keep in mind your own comfort with posting these types of things. The majority of this site is dedicated to the kink aspect of size content, so some readers might approach your story from that POV. Not trying to scare you away from sharing, but it’s good to be mindful of that.

[foreverlurk]

@skysayl said in Disaster and confrontation:

Except the therapist is a giant, and therefore the source for a lot of triggering moments.

I’m curious about that part - do you mean “triggering” in a therapeutically good way? Like during CBT’s exposure part?

For my part I’ve often thought of tinies as ideal therapists, as non-threathening as they are, makes it easier to open up. No distracting eye contact either.

[Olo]

@foreverlurk said:

I’ve often thought of tinies as ideal therapists, as non-threathening as they are, makes it easier to open up.

Ideal. They can even surreptitiously accompany you for stressful situations and talk you down from a panic attack.

[littlest-lily]

@Olo I can totally see that. Meanwhile, during an actual panic attack I (sometimes) seriously benefit from being held by someone I deeply trust. Similar to how some people are comfort by weighted blankets, I guess, or babies when they’re being swaddled. A massive, caring, protective presence is my kind of therapy.

[Olo]

@littlest-lily I just started using a weighted blanket a couple of months ago. I’ll most likely stop using it when it gets warmer, but for now it has really helped me get to sleep quicker.

by Tillie Walden

[skysayl]

@foreverlurk said in Disaster and confrontation:

I’m curious about that part - do you mean “triggering” in a therapeutically good way? Like during CBT’s exposure part?

Exactly as in exposure therapy.

The giant in this context isn’t the one who inflicted the initial trauma, but they do represent it by virtue of being, well, giant.

@blehb said in Disaster and confrontation:

The majority of this site is dedicated to the kink aspect of size content, so some readers might approach your story from that POV. Not trying to scare you away from sharing, but it’s good to be mindful of that.

Oh, that makes perfect sense. It’s another one of the reasons I hesitate, actually. There are definitely kinks involved every time I write, but sometimes they’re hidden behind a wall of buildup. I guess I enjoy it as a payoff, rather than instant gratification. I think I fall almost purely in femgaze for that reason alone lol

[wildxpixie]

@littlest-lily This 14 step program reminds me of a one-shot I read on deviantArt probably over a decade ago.

My hazy memory of it was in the lore, giants could shift between a ‘human’ size and being over a hundred feet tall, but being human size was super uncomfortable. The woman was terrified of giants and because of terror from humans, the giant didn’t feel comfortable returning to his true form, but they helped each other out - her encouraging him to shift back to his true size, holding his hand at first as he started to get bigger, then being in his hand. Goodness, what a cute little story it was.

[blehb]

@skysayl said in Disaster and confrontation:

Oh, that makes perfect sense. It’s another one of the reasons I hesitate, actually. There are definitely kinks involved every time I write, but sometimes they’re hidden behind a wall of buildup. I guess I enjoy it as a payoff, rather than instant gratification. I think I fall almost purely in femgaze for that reason alone lol

I’m sorry if I came across as sounding like people here wouldn’t enjoy the buildup. Quite the opposite - the buildup is everything to me! I feel the exact same way you do, so now I’m even more interested.

I was more implying that there will undoubtedly be readers who sexualize the content. If what you’re writing is important or therapeutic to you and you’re not comfortable with people doing that, then that’s totally understandable. I know most of the regulars here would be kind and respectful, but I think it’s good to be mindful or lurkers who might not be as considerate.

[Olo]

@skysayl said:

I guess I enjoy it as a payoff, rather than instant gratification. I think I fall almost purely in femgaze for that reason alone lol

I’m curious how people around here define “femgaze,” what they think it’s specific characteristics are.

[littlest-lily]

@Olo I’ll toss out my own opinion on this one! To explain how I think of it in very broad strokes, “male gaze” to me is more of a focus on the physical (in the past when I’ve RP’d with dudes, most of the time they would ask me what my character was wearing - just as an example). Whereas “female gaze” feels like it has a bit more of a focus on the emotional - inner monologues, slow burns, angst. At least this is what I’ve gathered from the stuff I’ve read and the demographics of the different communities I’ve been a part of. Obviously this is a big generalization and all genders can enjoy any of it~

[foreverlurk]

@Olo

I’m not female so maybe not qualified to answer fully, but what I personally like about it compared to MOST (not all) male writers :

• Larger overall focus on psychological aspects and growth of characters
• Insights and narratives presented purely from the SW’s point of view (sooo interesting)
• Slower pace overall, richer build-up to get to the spicy parts (bigger payoff!)
• More space and easier for me to insert as the male/giant in stories, sometimes eerily so(!)

My take is that usually the male gaze is focused on our (male) needs without delving too much into the consequences of such actions. I guess partly because some male authors would then share at least some level of guilt or shame at their character’s actions, or also perhaps because they don’t actually care and see the SW as a sex object/tool (which is okay sometimes, not judging).

But again I want to reiterate not all male authors are like that.

[Olo]

@littlest-lily said:

Obviously this is a big generalization and all genders can enjoy any of it~

I imagine everyone is capable of either “gaze,” and I asked because I want to work on them.

[miss-lillipants]

@Olo

@littlest-lily and @foreverlurk have covered a lot already, but I’ll also weight in. Unlike what the term suggests, it’s an approach to story-telling that’s not exclusively for women, but so named when understood as a contrast to the concept of the “male gaze” and as something that specifically centres a woman/women as a character.

For me, as mentioned, it’s about building empathy and understanding for a character (usually, a woman) as a person with emotions, rather than someone to be objectified. They normally also have some agency, even if it’s just to have an opinion or thoughts in a hopeless situation, rather than some voiceless, mindless doll. I think the “slower” pace is a consequence of this kind of narrative rather than a characteristic per se because it takes time to develop something/someone that is complex, rather than simply focussing on what they look like and how that will gratify the viewer/reader. So you can already expect a build-up like that to be relatively slow - just depends on how much of a burn or detail the creator wants to achieve.

This article is a good intro summary and also talks about respecting the character as well. Re: respect, I don’t think this should be synonymous with “liking” a character or putting them on some pedestal. You can create dislikable, even morally corrupt characters, who you can respect/have due regard for as a person with depth, motivations, struggles, joys, etc. And then you can throw them in the bin - metaphorically and/or literally, whatever floats your boat.