Out of their Element

[Olo]

@littlest-lily If she had to do it herself, it must have taken Evie a while to compile her deck.

Moira saw everything but she played it straight like the good wingman she is.

[littlest-lily]

@Olo This was so briefly mentioned in part 1 (and I don’t expect anyone to remember it!) but Evie had indeed spent a long time compiling her own decks. So it was already done, no way she could have managed that with her injury

I love your faith in Moira hehehe

[littlest-lily]

Chapter 47
Aiden

I’m very excited about two things today.

For one, Evie’s walking has gotten so much better. We haven’t been wrapping her leg for a while now, she doesn’t need crutches nearly as often, and in fact I could hardly notice any kind of limp this morning. The cut is still quite visible, as I’m sure it will be for a while yet, but after almost three weeks of healing she’s nearly independent again. At least, as independent as she used to be.

The other thing is that we have a date planned. An actual, proper date. It wasn’t presented that way, but we both know that’s what it is. She’s the one who initiated it, actually.

“You know the Laid Back Camp movie?” she had asked me one day, pointing at something she was reading on her phone, “There’s a special screening in our area! Can we go?”

I perked up at the suggestion, having a soft spot for the show itself and for the fact that it was the first anime we watched together. “I’d love to! Except… do you think you can handle it? Isn’t the screen going to be, like, ginormous for you? Not to mention the sound.”

“I’ll bring something to plug my ears with. I think it’s worth a shot!”

And that was that. Now here I am walking around the movie theater lobby with a tiny girl hiding up near my shoulder, within the folds of the hood of my jacket. Not only is the hoodie nice for the theater, where they pump in way too much AC, but it’s easier to talk to her this way than if she were in my shirt pocket. We figured it’d be a little weird for me to pretend to be on the phone here, so we’ve gone back to the simple whispering tactic.

We got here nice and early, which means we have the time to look at some of the movie posters in a rather empty hallway to kill time. I gaze up at what looks like one solid black rectangle, until I notice that there’s a glossy texture on parts of it so that a pair of wide, demonic eyes appear under the right light, with a release date underneath. Freaky.

“What’s your opinion on horror movies?” Evie asks from near my ear. She’s more or less sitting on the base of the hood, which is resting on the downward slope of the back of my shoulder. I can just feel her elbows softly leaning on the skin near neck… Such a nice little spot to keep her in.

“I guess I’m neutral?" I answer quietly, "I don’t really scare easily when it’s just a movie. I tend to poke fun at it, the rare instance I’m forced to watch one. You?”

“I’m… a total scaredy cat. I can handle gore okay, but anything that’s too spooky and I’m a whimpering mess.”

“We should watch one together then! It’s a good time if you just make fun of it the whole time. You’ll see.”

“Nooooo no no no, I’m too scared. Forget I said anything.”

I won’t actually force her to watch anything she doesn’t want. But the idea of a girl fearfully snuggling into you while watching a horror flick is already kind of cute when she’s normal sized. Much less when she’s tiny and burrowing herself into your hands instead. I briefly imagine Evie trying to hide by scurrying down the front of my shirt, and I have trouble fighting back laughter.

“I’d protect you, little one,” I say soothingly, and she nuzzles against my neck in response. I keep moving down the hallway, to the next poster, feeling like I’m walking on clouds.

I can’t believe we’re doing this. I really am taking her out. Somewhere that’s not walking distance from my apartment, but someplace new. The first outing of many, I hope.

We had to drive to get here, which means I was finally able to acquire the new piece of protection to help keep Evie safe in my pocket. Moira has a friend she knows through work who’s really crafty, and I was able to commission what I’m sure sounded like a very odd request. I’d just met up with Mo yesterday so that she could hand it off to me.

“Here you go, try it out,” she said with an eager smile, giving me what looked like a thick piece of plastic about the size of a playing card. It was a roughly rectangular shape, with a top wider than the bottom, and the entire thing was curved through some kind of heat treatment. On the inside of the curvature there were a couple of layers of soft fabric adhered to the hard plastic.

I’d made sure to wear a shirt with a pocket for the occasion. I slid the plastic inside, and the dimensions were flawless. There was now a protective barrier lining the inside of my pocket, so that if the car’s airbag ever popped out it shouldn’t crush any tiny people inside, while still giving Evie a padded surface to crash into. It would give me a hell of a bruise, but I can deal with that. There’s enough of a gap formed by the curved plastic that she would have plenty of room, and the layer of cloth should help it still be comfortable. I can just store this thing in the car, and any time I want to bring her with me on a drive, I can easily slip it in and out.

And just like that, I felt the world opening back up to us. The possibilities were suddenly endless.

We’re both buzzing with excitement as we head into the darkness of the theater, and I make a beeline for the back row, wanting to get as far away from the screen as physically possible. I pick out a spot and cautiously sit down, glancing around myself. There’s one other couple on the far end of the row, but otherwise we’re pretty isolated. I set down our little bucket of popcorn - yes, I got some despite how overpriced it is. It’s a special occasion.

After a few minutes of waiting for people to trickle in, I silently creep one hand up to the hood of my jacket, and without having to say anything I feel Evie climb into it. I bring her around to the front of me, still keeping her close to avoid anyone seeing, holding her just around my collarbone.

“Well?” I whisper, glancing down in her direction. Her face keeps whipping around, this way and that, not just looking around for nearby people but also still taking in the sheer expanse of the theater screen. I wonder what it must be like for her.

“It’s hard to even look at all of it at once,” she marvels.

“Uh oh. Too much to handle?”

“Nah, since we’re so far away it’s fine. It’s like… watching a projection on a canyon wall, but from a quarter mile away.”

“Whoa. Well, just say the word if you change your mind. In the meantime, let’s make sure your ears are more protected…”

I reach into my jacket pocket to fish out a cotton ball and hand it to her. It was the only thing we could think of to use - it’s as big as a beach ball in her hands, but she’s able to tear off tiny pieces of it and stuff them into her ears. At least, I hope she’s having success, because the lights suddenly dim further, and as my eyes adjust I have trouble making her out.

“Whack me if you need anything, okay?” I murmur.

“What?”

Oh crap. Didn’t think of this. I glance around furtively before I try raising my voice at all, but a second later Evie laughs and says, “Just kidding, you’re still not exactly quiet to m–”

The boom of the speakers splits the air and I hear a tiny squeak of a yell. There’s a panicked shuffling against my palm, and as the theater screen lights up the room from whatever kids’ movie trailer it’s showing, I can see my friend’s small figure nearly tripping over herself trying to climb back onto my shoulder. Instead I quickly lift her higher, up by my ear, so that I can hear her response when I ask, “Should we leave?”

Evie leans heavily against the side of my face, trembling, but I can feel her taking deep, steadying breaths. She has to yell over the obnoxious noise of the trailer. “N-no. I’m getting used to it. It’s just like… a concert. No biggie, I just need a m-minute. The cotton’s much better than nothing.”

I cup her in both hands against me, hold her close, stroke her back with a finger. To be completely honest, this is a small theater and the sound system isn’t that great - for the average person it’s on the quiet side. But again, just like with the size of the screen, I can’t even begin to imagine what the experience must be like for someone so small.

The trailer ends and I hear a softer breath as she seems to unclench. She shifts against me, and it takes me a second to realize it, but she’s giving me a kiss on the cheek. “I’m good,” she says, and the strength definitely seems to have returned to her voice.

I still keep her in my hand for a bit, just to be sure, gradually lowering her to my chest level. Finally as the trailers end and the movie begins, I help her settle onto the armrest. She’s already come around in the past few minutes, having acclimated to the overstimulating environment, and now she’s getting excited again.

I’m distracted from the film as I continue feeling the need to watch over her. When the fireworks begin bursting over the introductory scene, she looks skyward to beam up at me, before pointing eagerly towards the screen, clearly indicating that I should be watching too. I chuckle and look ahead of me, she sits leaning against my wrist, and I’m just so happy to be here right now. My little secret at my side, unbeknownst to everyone else in the room.

We’re about twenty minutes into the movie before I suddenly remember that the popcorn exists. I nudge my thumb against Evie to get her attention before bringing the little tub into view. Well, anytime I think the word “little” I have to temper myself - to her the container is more like a koi fish pond. She straightens up, having also apparently forgotten about the treat until now, and nods excitedly. I put the bucket in my lap and pluck out one of the kernels to hand to her. She gives me a thumbs up and starts nibbling away at it.

I pick at the snack too, but I’m paying attention to the screen again so I’m not sure exactly what happens a few minutes later. Maybe the kernel I’d given her was burnt? Maybe it was mostly un-popped? Regardless, at some point she decided she needed another piece, and instead of getting my attention, she must have tried to reach out from the armrest to get it herself. I feel it more than I hear it, a slight shift of the container in my lap. And I look down to see a pair of tiny legs protruding from the popcorn and flailing wildly.

My breath hitches as I reach down, instinctively wanting to yank her back up by the legs. But in the dark I can’t tell which limb is which and I’m scared to touch the one that’s still healing. A second later, Evie wriggles into a seated position while managing not to sink deeper, her head popping out as if she was sitting in a foam pit. I’m surprised to see that she’s laughing, hard, completely caught in a fit of giggles. I can’t help breaking into quiet laughter myself, relieved that she seems fine.

“Why didn’t you just ask me for more?” I ask through a chuckle, digging a couple of fingers into the popcorn to fish her out.

“I felt dumb for having dropped the one you gave me!” she calls up. “I thought I had it… And now I’m covered in butter.”

My shoulders droop a little as I let out a slow sigh through my nose. She said the same thing the day she got injured. “I thought I had it.” Come on, girl. I know it sucks, but why can’t you just acknowledge your limits? When are you going to feel okay relying on me?

When I met up with Moira yesterday to get the reimagined “pocket protector,” this subject actually came up in conversation.

“How’s she doing?” Mo had asked, her expression turning a little more serious.

“Since you saw her yesterday?” I teased. She’s been at our apartment almost every weekday to be there for Evie while I’m at work.

“Yeah. She seemed kinda down - at least I think. It’s hard to tell sometimes.”

I became more serious too, both saddened and relieved to be reminded that I’m not the only one who sometimes feels unsure about what goes on in our friend’s head. “She’s alright,” I said, “Her leg’s doing a lot better today, after a couple of days of it getting worse, so she seemed in higher spirits this morning. Of course, if she stopped trying to do things by herself maybe it’d finish healing faster…”

Moira raised her eyebrows before prompting, “Sounds like that’s bothering you?”

I looked away, towards the window of the cafe we were at. “A little. I understand that she wants some amount of independence, this is nothing new. But… refusing to ask for help is part of why the injury was so bad in the first place. She was getting better about calling for me when she couldn’t walk at all, I guess she had no choice then. But now it’s like she’s going right back to her old habits.”

I hadn’t realized how much this was weighing on me until it all tumbled out. I sighed and leaned back in my chair.

“In some ways she’s gotten much more open with me since she moved in, and in others she’s just as closed off as ever,” I finally muttered, still staring out the window. “After all this time, I just wish she’d be okay leaning on me more. I’m constantly worrying.”

I felt a pressure on my forearm and turned to see Moira had reached across the table to give it a squeeze. She had a small, sympathetic smile on her face.

“I say this with love,” she gently countered, “Because I know how much you’re always wanting to help people. Aiden, you can’t solve all of her problems for her.”

My jaw clenched as my first thought was, Maybe I could if she’d let me.

But instead all I said was a quiet, “I know.”

I gaze down at Evie as she pulls herself out of the popcorn and onto my hand. Even now she’s acting so apologetic through her laughter. Almost… deferential. As if I was her superior in some way, not just her friend.

I wonder why we have such a hard time finding the right balance. Should I have a more serious talk with her about it? I’m not sure what I’d say that I haven’t already tried to say. I don’t know how much of it is just something I’m building up in my own head, making a mountain out of a molehill. Hell, am I the one fully at fault here? Am I not respecting her enough?

Or could it be that… she still sees me as a threat, on some level? Is she afraid of opening up to me? I’m still not over what happened that night after my final exams - I still have moments where I wake up in a cold sweat, haunted by her screams. Maybe it’s the same with her, maybe it affects her more than she lets on…

My chest feels tight as for a second I look away from her, trying to get a hold of myself, and I glance up at the theater screen instead. The character in the movie is looking towards a mountain in the dark, and the music swells as the sunrise peeks over the mountain and lights up the sky, making the valley come to life. The artwork really is beautiful.

Why am I thinking about all this right now? I need to stop overanalyzing every little thing. We’re on what might be considered a first date, I don’t want anxiety to get in the way. I just want to enjoy this.

“Do you want to go wash off?” I ask Evie, “I can take you to a bathroom sink?”

“I think it’s pointless, it’s all over my outfit too and I don’t want wet clothes. You just gotta deal with me being covered in oil and salt.”

I grin and lift her to my face to kiss her upper back. I can only imagine what the couple on the other end of the row might be thinking if they notice my movements - maybe that I just have a really weird way of eating. But it’s dark, and from the way that I cup my hand around her, I’m confident that I’m keeping her hidden at least.

“Well the bonus is that you taste delicious now,” I mutter, still holding her against my mouth. “Maybe I should keep you right here for the rest of the movie.”

“There we go, that’s how we can wash me off! Like a cat.”

“Mmm, careful with your suggestions. You’re tempting fate,” I murmur, choosing not to actually use my tongue but still continuing to gently kiss her frame. Evie has residual giggles, and from the way she writhes against me I think I’m tickling her when I reach her waist. But she’s not pulling away, if anything she’s leaning into it.

And with that, I’m right back in my happy place, the anxiety dissipating. After all, the things I cherish about this girl far outweigh the parts that bother me. I adore her laugh. The ways she shows affection. The way she fits in the palm of my hand. I appreciate the sweet moments, and the silly ones - the times where we learn from each other or have fun together or relax in tandem. It’s all so worth it.

I’m a patient guy. Whatever reservations she has, I can wait for her to figure them out. All I can do is reach out my hand and open my heart. It’s up to her to decide what she wants to do with that. And I have every hope that we will find a balance.

[Olo]

@littlest-lily You had me at “covered in butter.”

[littlest-lily]

Chapter 48
Evie

“Hey, Moira?”

I try to time my question for when my petite-but-still-enormous friend isn’t so concentrated on the detail work that she’s in the middle of. She’s been very focused on painting a mug and has just set down her brush to look over her progress. But she shoots me a warm smile the second I say her name.

“What’s up?”

“Do you like camping?” I pause in the middle of my own painting work. This is one of those rare occasions where all three of Mo’s roommates are out at the same time, so I’m hanging out at her place for once. We just had dinner and are getting some work done for our Etsy shops while Aiden’s out with a couple of friends.

Moira leans an elbow on the table as she ponders this. “I haven’t done a whole lot of it. I like being outside, but… I don’t really love the whole tent thing. Why? Is Aiden planning on bringing you on one of his camping trips?”

“No, not really. We keep talking about it as if we’ll do it one day, but I think it’s mostly wishful thinking. I’ve never camped before… I’d love to try it, but it’s probably not a good idea.”

“Hmm, because of the critters and stuff?”

“And the close quarters. Not sure where I’d sleep in a one-person tent. Maybe in a box or something.”

“Well, if you’re going to try camping with anyone, I think he’d be the one to do it with. Even if I knew what I was doing, it’s not like I’m ever able to take time off.”

I feel suddenly derailed by this detail. “Aww, Mo! When’s the last time you took a vacation?”

“Um…” Moira idly taps a finger against the surface of the table. “Trips like the one to Florida don’t count?”

“Nope. Something not work related.” I’ve left the mini I was working on to take a few steps closer to her. I drape my forearms onto hers, looking up at her expectantly.

“It’s probably been years then…” She gives me a half smile and shrugs her shoulders. “I’ve got big dreams. Gotta put in the time so I can reach them.”

“I really, really admire you for that,” I say, and this time I lean forward to rest my chin on her arm too. “But I’m worried you’ll burn out. No matter how much yoga and Tai Chi you do. We should all go on a trip somewhere!”

She lets out a little laugh. “The three of us? I’m down.” In a gentle yet playful gesture she reaches over to poke the top of my head. “Though you sure I wouldn’t just be in the way?”

My mouth snaps shut. I can feel myself blushing fervently. Has she figured out that Aiden and I…?

Thankfully I’m spared answering her when there’s an unfamiliar dinging sound that splits the air. Moira gasps, “Oh oh oh! Evie, look! You’ve got an order!”

I immediately pivot, whipping around to where she’s pointing. I have my phone propped up a short distance away, and there’s a notification from the Etsy app that has lit the screen up.

“Oh my god,” I breathe, putting a hand to my mouth. “It’s my first one.” I just made the Bitty Forge storefront public yesterday. I had no idea how long it would take for someone to buy something.

“Really?! Congrats, girl!”

I’m hurrying over to my phone now to open up the app and see which of the figurines was purchased. Gnome bard. Yeah, I was pretty proud of that one. Soon she’ll have a new home in Nebraska. My mind’s already busy with the fact that I’ll need to write out a receipt and pack up the mini tomorrow - it’s one of the smaller ones so I’m pretty confident I can do it myself. I’ll have to rely on Aiden to mail it out for me, but thankfully the post office is about a block away from home, the plan is for him to drop packages off on the way to work. Holy crap… it’s happening. I can actually make money at this size!

While I’m fussing over that, Moira’s own phone buzzes and she swiftly answers the call. “Hey! You all done with dinner?”

I can’t quite make out everything that he’s saying, but I recognize Aiden’s voice on the other end of the line. I abandon what I was doing and quickly start packing up the paints and materials I’d just been using. Once Mo’s off the phone, she helps me gather up the rest and then escorts me out of her apartment building.

Even though the sun is setting and it’s getting darker, I can tell which car we’re heading towards from afar. The glass window on the driver’s side starts lowering, my bright-eyed roommate smiling from within. He quickly notices me poking my head out from my usual spot in the purse-carrier, and after a brief glance around to make sure no one’s there, he reaches a hand out preemptively as we make our way over to him.

“Guess who got her first sale!” Moira sings, carefully lifting me out of her bag and holding me up, as if displaying a child’s artwork, before she hands me over.

“Oh shit! That’s awesome, Evie!” Aiden’s beaming now as I hop onto his palm, and I feel like I’m melting as our eyes meet and he guides me into the car. I can tell he was about to bring me right to his mouth but thought better of it… We really do just need to tell Moira already. It feels like we’ve been waiting for some sort of event to mark our relationship as something official, but maybe that’s silly.

We say goodbye to our friend, and soon I’m sitting in a pocket, cheek pressed up against the giant’s chest as I snuggle into him and drink in his warmth. I hear a thump outside the thick wall that lines the pocket. I think Aiden’s still getting used to the fact that there’s a barrier there whenever he’s driving.

“Hey,” he says enthusiastically, “Would you be down to go out somewhere?”

I glance up. “Right now?”

“Yeah! I want to celebrate you starting your own business. It’s pretty amazing, you know.”

“Aww thank you. I couldn’t have done it without you. And now I can actually earn my keep!"

He sighs softly but jokes along. “Good thing too. I was thiiiis close to kicking you out.”

I grin and snuggle deeper into his shirt. “I’d love to go somewhere with you.”

“Okay, great! I have just the place in mind.”

He takes me to “Kleine Blume,” which is a beer garden of some sort. At least that’s what he calls it, but he explains it’s more like a small restaurant with mostly outdoor seating. I’m a little surprised, we’ve never actually eaten at a restaurant before, always opting to get takeout. But we’ve both already had dinner so a meal can’t be why we’re here anyway. I remain firmly out of sight as I hear the buzz of many titans’ conversations in the distance, until the noise begins to die down somewhat as it feels like Aiden turns a corner. A few moments later we descend, so I figure he’s now sitting, and then the pocket buckles inward as he’s able to touch me through the fabric now that the plastic barrier’s gone.

“Come on out!" He’s speaking openly, even if it’s still at a low volume. I tentatively get to my feet, peering out at our surroundings, vast and open. Me standing up seems to be signal enough for giant fingers to reach right in and pinch me around the torso. I flinch as I grab at his hand reflexively, feeling nervous since he’s picking me up before I got a good look around.

“This place is private?” I ask, but I quickly see that there’s no one in sight in the vicinity. We’re at one of four wooden tables, the rest of them empty. There’s a small building a short distance away - although to me it’s a massive building that’s quite far. The commotion seems to be coming from beyond it, with mostly just soft acoustic guitar reaching our location from some kind of live music set.

“Most of the tables are on the other side of this building,” Aiden confirms, “Plus it’s pretty dark. Figured we’d be okay back here.”

He’s right, it’s quickly becoming dim now that the sun has set. The tables in the area are all candlelit, though, which is really nice. The glow that’s coming from the inside of the building makes it a little less difficult to see, too. I’m quickly relaxing at the peaceful feeling of the space.

“I used to come here a lot in my first year of grad school,” Aiden says, watching me with a smile as I explore the width of the table. “It’s a nice place to study during the day, not sure why I stopped coming. Want to get a drink?”

I come up to the sprawling menu and glance over it curiously. There’s a small section for food and a much larger section for alcohol - apparently it’s not just beer. “Um, I’m good,” I respond, feeling the thick paper beneath my bare feet as I pad my way along the edge of it. “You feel free to, though.”

“You sure? Come to think of it… You’ve never really shared an interest in drinking, have you?”

I bristle, suddenly feeling a bit uncomfortable, and I step off of the menu. “Yeah, I’m not a fan…” I say evenly, walking towards the candle instead so that I can gaze at its flame. “I have my own reservations about alcohol. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have some!”

There’s the slight creaking of wood below my feet as Aiden leans more of his weight onto the table. “I don’t have to get anything alcoholic,” he insists, “And you don’t have to talk about it, but…” A fingertip brushes me between the shoulder blades. “You know you can tell me anything, yeah?”

I pivot, turning back towards him like a magnet drawn to iron. Such an odd thing, how he towers above me like a monstrous predator and yet I feel so safe around him… Large swaths of my past are sensitive subjects that I desperately avoid, but this one shouldn’t be too bad. I can talk about this.

“Thanks,” I say with a smile, “I um… I…”

Well… I thought I’d be able to talk about it. But nothing’s coming out.

The candlelight dances in Aiden’s eyes as he moves a bit closer and gently prompts, “Did someone you know tend to drink a bit too much?”

“My dad. Apparently,” I finally say with a nod. And now that he’s coaxed this much out of me, the rest comes more easily. “He didn’t get violent or anything, as far as I can remember. He passed away when I was really young so I don’t recall much… But I was always told that alcohol was a bad thing growing up.”

The giant frowns sympathetically. “I see. I can understand how seeing someone else drinking might be a little triggering then?”

Something shifts inside me. That simple moment of recounting and reflecting gives me a sensation I wasn’t expecting. A catharsis, and a determination to move on.

“Actually, not really,” I say, “I never saw him do it, I was just told he did. My mom would get angry if I ever got curious about it.” I pause and then add, “You know what, nevermind. I want to try it. Let’s get a drink!”

“You sure?” Aiden asks again, this time with a budding smile.

“Yes,” I reply confidently.

“Okay. I promise I won’t overdo it, I’ll need to drive back anyway. So if you’re not used to drinking, let’s get something that’s not too strong? Daiquiris aren’t usually bad, they’re more like dessert. There are a couple of different options here…”

I hurry back over to the menu, still unable to move as quickly as I’d like due to my leg, and now I’m feeling a growing excitement at trying something new. We make a selection and Aiden spots a fellow giant in the distance that he waves over. He hides me in a closed hand under the table so that he can order the cocktail, and then a few minutes later there’s a twelve foot cocktail glass on the table.

The fruity scents of the pineapple daiquiri drift down to where I’m standing. “This feels like a tropical summer evening on a beach,” I comment contentedly, enjoying a gentle warm breeze that’s passing through.

“We just need the sounds of the ocean,” Aiden agrees, and he’s busy sealing one end of the straw with a finger so that he can extract some of the sugary drink for me. He lowers it down to where I’m standing before glancing up towards the sky. “I wonder if they’re going to…”

He trails off and doesn’t finish his sentence, but I’m too distracted by the deliciously smelling black tube that is now hovering next to me. I take it in both hands, noticing the dome of a giant droplet of liquid just inside. Stuff like surface tension still weirds me out sometimes, but not enough to stop me from taking a sip from the drop.

“Oh… damn that’s good!” I say eagerly, until the burn hits. Wowza. It’s not horrible, just very different from what I’m used to.

“Glad you like it,” Aiden chuckles, taking a sip of his own straight from the glass. “Let’s not have you go overboard now!”

The heat that’s now in my stomach tells me I don’t think that will be a problem. I look up towards my towering friend, and I realize just how dark it’s gotten. I’d only be seeing his silhouette if it wasn’t for the candlelight casting a warm glow on his skin. I’m just about to comment on it getting harder to see when it happens.

As if a stage play were coming to life, the entire area gets bathed in gentle illumination. Countless strands of string lights have turned on far above us like a plethora of stars covering the night sky.

“There it is,” says my gigantic companion with satisfaction. I feel his eyes on me as I look wildly around at the hundreds of lights above us. They’re so beautiful. Now I definitely feel like I’m on some magical summer vacation. A rather romantic one at that…

We continue to sip away at the treat, chatting avidly the entire time. Aiden tells me a lively story about the first time he got really drunk, off of cheap beer and expensive whiskey, with people he hardly knew. The tale includes multiple park fountains, a group of math professors, and one very territorial pigeon, and by the end I’m laughing so hard that I almost fall over. I don’t think I’m actually getting tipsy at this point, just… high off of joy, I guess. This is turning into a great night.

My drinking partner’s currently focusing on his phone, scrolling through his photos to find the one someone took of him climbing out of the fountain. I allow myself to stare at him, feeling my face flush the longer I do so.

Despite spending so much time looking down at me, he still manages to have such good posture, his shoulders broad and strong. The golden lights make his skin look so warm and inviting, as if beckoning me to snuggle against him. For a moment I focus on his face. He has such fine features - I wouldn’t call them feminine, but they’re still unobtrusive, leaving nothing to distract from the beauty of his eyes. The way the tiny string lights reflect in the hazel make them look like portals to heaven. God, have I always found him this attractive? Or is it because I’ve come to adore this person more than anything else on the planet?

“Have I ever told you how gorgeous your eyes are?" It’s only once I hear it come out of my mouth that I realize I just said that out loud. The giant looks up from his phone to meet my gaze, looking surprised. I didn’t mean to say it, maybe I should be feeling embarrassed. But I’m not.

Aiden sets his phone down, the search for the photo forgotten. But as he shifts all of his attention to me it’s clear that he’s not sure how to respond, just managing to summon a shy, quizzical smile. That’s alright, I can take up the mantle again. I get to my feet and reach a hand up in his direction.

“Can you come down here?” I ask.

He doesn’t hesitate then, folding his arms on the table and lowering his head in one smooth motion. His eyes never leave mine, and I almost feel dizzy at the sight of his approach. He’s so massive and yet so careful, so conscious of his every movement. I step up to him without any reservation as he tilts his face to settle his cheek against the back of his hand. I reach out to pet the bridge of his nose, one caring stroke before I lean my forehead against it.

“I used to find you so intimidating, at first,” I mumble, “That’s so weird to think about.”

“I can’t exactly blame you,” Aiden says softly.

“Still, it feels like so long ago. Little did I know that I was in the best hands possible. I love spending time with you, Aiden. I could have ended up with anyone… But I’m so thankful it was with you.”

I hear his happy exhale, like quiet laughter. Suddenly I feel his finger against my spine, creating a soft pressure that makes every muscle in my back relax. I didn’t see his hand approach but I still sensed its warm presence - I’ve gotten so accustomed to it - and I don’t startle in the slightest.

“You’re such a sweetheart," he murmurs, his voice wavering slightly with emotion, “You make me so happy, Evie.”

I pull away from him for a moment, stepping back to better meet his gaze. “Can I try something?"

He inclines his head in response, a curious smile narrowing his eyes. I walk along his face, letting my fingers trail against his nose, until I reach his mouth. I hesitate for only a moment before coming closer… and gently kissing his upper lip.

His reaction is immediate. The soft pink skin is suddenly gone as Aiden inhales sharply and lifts his head back up. He’s still quite close, his chin hovering maybe an inch above the table, but he’s pulled back far enough to get a good look at me. He looks completely taken aback, as shocked as if I’d bitten him.

I can’t help giggling at the flabbergasted look on his face. I’ve let him kiss me so many times now, but it was always on my back or on the top of my head or something. This is the first time I’ve attempted to truly kiss him back.

“Could you even feel that?" I ask with amusement.

He breathes in, holds it, breathes out again, still staring at me intently. “Yes," he says, and I notice how flushed his cheeks are. He puts a hand just behind me, cupping it around my frame before breathlessly repeating, “Yes…"

He starts to lean forward again, and his palm pushes against my back. I stumble forward, and my heart starts racing, and his mouth is swooping in. It doesn’t feel too forceful, his guiding hand is gentle, and then his lips embrace me in a way they never have before.

I close my eyes, focusing on the physical sensations. It starts out soft and familiar, warm pressure against my cheek, shoulder, arm. Then it moves down and envelops my chest and stomach. Back up, and he covers more of my face now, and I don’t care that my own lips probably feel more like pinpricks to him - I kiss him, again and again and again. In response I hear - and feel - the softest moan. He’s always been careful about not getting any saliva on me, but he’s more passionate this time, and as he moves lower along my body his lips part just enough that I feel a dampness against the hem of my shirt. Warm air passes over my stomach, sweet from the pineapple on his breath. I take all of it in avidly, pressing myself into him, yearning for more.

I had wondered before, and now I have my answer… This is how we kiss. It’s not just his mouth against my mouth, it’s so much more than that. It’s like a dance where I use my entire body, it’s his essence blending into mine. It’s overwhelming, exhilarating, comforting, all at once. After a minute has passed, even though I’m nowhere near intoxicated by alcohol, I feel drunk with the sensation of his skin against my own.

We don’t go on for much longer than that - the giant finally pulls away from me and I slump backwards, landing on the slope of his palm and letting myself sprawl out as I try to catch my breath. Aiden lifts me up, continuing to hold me so close, unable to keep an elated grin off his face. I’m beaming right back. And then we’re laughing, soft chuckles that fill the air and frolic amongst the twinkling lights above us.

[Olo]

@littlest-lily

[Mo] helps me gather up the rest and then escorts me out of her apartment building.

Sounds very dignified.

G/t kissing is special, and I’m glad we got this from Evie’s POV. Now do you get the appeal, Evie?

[littlest-lily]

@Olo She’s certainly warming up to the idea hehe

[littlest-lily]

Chapter 49
Evie

My boyfriend stands at the end of the bed, a crooked smile bringing a gentle warmth to his face. His brilliant blue eyes trail across the length of my body, hungry and eager. He was just in the middle of getting changed, so he’s currently shirtless, every toned and bulging muscle in his upper body on full display. I match his smile from my position sprawled on the bed, marveling at the sight of him. I’ve always thought that if he just let those platinum blonde locks of his grow out a little bit that he’d easily be able to pass off as a movie star.

And yet he’s the one looking at me with quite the lustful stare. “You look like something out of a painting,” he observes with a soft, deep voice. “My very own piece of art.”

These days the average person might think I’m a little bit underweight, actually. Up until not so long ago I’d been on my feet all day for my job, and I also didn’t have much opportunity to eat while working so… I’ve lost some weight in recent years. Of course I happen to be aware that my man prefers me slender, so I’m pretty careful about my diet anyway.

“You’re not so bad yourself, sir,” I say, stretching my arms over my head languidly and further tangling myself in the sheets.

He strolls around the corner of the bed so that he can reach me. He sits on the edge of the mattress and lays a hand over my abdomen, fingers splayed. Then he leans in, his head hovering above mine.

“How about you and I play a little game of dress up, hm? You still haven’t tried on that green dress.”

I laugh quietly at how excited he’s getting. “Can it wait until after dinner?” I ask, “It’s getting late.” I’m trying not to call him out too blatantly on how it was already 7pm when he got home from work.

“Oh… Darling.” His fingers grip me a little tighter, digging into my skin ever so slightly. “Are you really going to let me down like that?”

My blood turns to ice in my veins.

~~*

I had a nightmare last night. A series of them, really. They’re a bit of a blur now, but I can still remember bits and pieces. Our old apartment. The lush, secluded forest. The diner I used to work at.

I wouldn’t dare mention anything about the dreams out loud, but they have been haunting me throughout the entire day. For better or worse, though, I’ve been spending a whole lot of time alone today. Aiden had his TA class in the morning, extended office hours in the afternoon, and right after that he’s going out for a friend’s birthday. Moira was going to at least be here during the day, but then she ended up sick with a stomach bug. I insisted to my roommate that he should still go out and enjoy himself, that even though my leg has actually been hurting a little worse recently, I’ll still be fine on my own. He ultimately agreed but reassured me that he’d be back right after dinner.

Despite making some progress on painting minis and successfully packing up two new orders, I’m struggling. I don’t have much appetite. I startle easily at the slightest noise outside. It feels like an old ghost from my past has settled heavily onto my shoulders, deciding to haunt me relentlessly. It’s probably a good thing I’m by myself, actually.

"Hello, little girl. Are you lost?”

"Heh, come on, stop that. Hey, I’m almost legal now! I’m so excited. Then we won’t have to be so secretive on date nights like this.”

“Mmm, but I kind of like having you as my little secret… Here, let me get that for you. Shall we, darling?”

I chase the memory away, feeling nauseous. I toss my paintbrush onto a towel and go to my phone. Just gotta stay distracted. Keep the lid on. The background on the device is one of the pictures Aiden and I took together. Focus on him. This is who I’m with now. It’s nothing like back then. We genuinely care about each other, this is real.

My gaze slips to the picture of myself, standing there next to his face. That’s really how I look to the rest of the world, isn’t it? So small and pathetic…

Not that he minds.

Tears fall over my cheek out of nowhere. I wipe them away furiously. I haven’t allowed myself to think about this particular fear since I first found out about Aiden’s kink… Stop it, stop it. I’m more than just my size to him. I know that. Why can’t I trust it? I turn away from the phone.

“Wait, please… stop…”

“Oh. I’m sorry. Is that not to your liking, princess?”

“It… it hurts…”

“Hmm, that’s a shame. How about this then?”

“Ow, ow–!”

“What was that? Don’t tell me you’re not enjoying this. Are you really still so sensitive, darling? Do I need to toughen you up?"

“N-no… no. It’s fine. I’m fine.”

“That’s better. There’s a good girl.”

I clutch the sides of my head. “Stop,” I hiss out loud. That’s enough. Just because some old memories came back to me in a dream doesn’t mean I can let them dominate me like this. It’s all from so long ago, it’s so far away. That part of my life is over, and I can’t let old fear poison my current relationship… I go back to my old mantra. Don’t give up. Fight back. Work harder.

I turn on some music, go back to painting. And I continue to desperately shove all of my anxiety as deep underground as I can. I’m fine.

I’m so relieved when Aiden finally returns. I’m feeling pretty exhausted at this point and all I want is for him to hold me. I silently tell him as much, tugging on his forefinger as soon as it comes within my vicinity, and then pushing his hand open so that I can climb into it for him to pick me up. He happily greets me with a warm touch and a soft kiss.

“How was it?” I ask him, “Were things winding down by the time you left?”

“Nope,” he laughs, nuzzling into me with a happy sigh, “They’ll be out drinking for hours yet.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to go with them?”

“I’m sure. I love Diego like a brother, but he can be way too much sometimes. I’d rather be home with you.”

I ask him more about his day and he tells me. With a smile I’m reclining in his hand, my back leaning against the wall of his fingers as I listen and let my mind escape for a little bit. I figuratively walk through his schedule with him, posing the occasional question to lengthen the process.

By the end of it he’s holding me a tad lower, and then he looks me over. “You doing alright?”

Damnit. I wasn’t even saying much of anything, but he can already sense that something’s up. “Just a bit tired,” I say evasively.

“Oh… Did you want to get some sleep then? I don’t want to keep you up.”

Aiden’s lowering me further, back down to the desk, and I’m starting to think he might have a point. As much as I enjoy him, maybe some rest would do me good after the stresses of the day. I slide off his hand with a stumble, flinching at the pain in my leg from stepping on it weird. That certainly doesn’t help things. I just wish this damn injury would be over and done with already. The lingering pain has recently been making us worry that it’s not healing right, or that it might have some hidden infection after all.

I sit onto my bed with a sigh and when I look back up, I freeze at the sight of the giant’s face. He’s looking just past me, eyes unfocused, with an expression that I’m not sure I’ve ever seen before. Not from him, at least. But it’s clear as day. Disappointment. He was looking forward to coming home and spending time with me. And now I’m failing him.

The heavy ghost of my nightmares tightens its grip on me. I feel a pain in my chest and my breath starts coming in more shallow. I can’t… I can’t let this just…

“I said I’m a bit tired,” I suddenly remark, catching his attention again. He perks up and it draws more out of me. I’m not even sure what I’m saying, it’s as if someone else is in the driver’s seat. “I got a lot of business stuff done today, it was more work than I thought it’d be… Maybe I just need some TLC.” I lay back on the bed, looking up at him suggestively.

Aiden smiles, reinvigorated and intrigued. “Well… I think I can help you there. If you like.”

He brings a finger up to gently brush the side of my face and the length of my neck. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. This is… nice, really. After the day I’ve had, maybe this is what I need after all. And it’ll make him happy, which is necessary. Er… I mean… it’s important. Important to me. Because I care about him. Obviously.

Anxiety continues to swirl at the pit of my stomach. My body starts moving of its own accord. I turn on my bed to encircle my arms around the me-sized index finger and kiss the lines of his fingerprint. His other hand joins in to softly massage my back, and I manage to let out a genuine sigh of pleasure. I’m still holding onto his finger and start wrapping my legs around it too.

Aiden chuckles. “Whatcha doing there, little monkey?”

“Just trying to touch you with as much of me as I can,” I say, clinging to him tightly. The pressure against my back strengthens and I sigh contentedly again.

“How can I make you feel good?” the giant murmurs. His tone is relaxed but clearly edging on seductive.

I’m not quite sure how to answer right now. “How can I make you feel good?” I counter, turning my head to look at him with my best attempt at a smirk.

“I asked first,” he laughs, “If I can help give you any kind of pleasure, that makes me feel good.”

Great. As kind as I know he’s being, now I have performance anxiety. Mechanically I take a slow breath, loosening my grip on him so that I can settle onto my back again. There’s a part of me that knows I should stop this. We’ve never gone farther than kissing and I’m pushing too hard, clearly forcing it. But I can’t really hear that part of me right now. Before I realize what I’m doing, I’ve pulled the hem of my shirt up a couple of inches, revealing a thin strip of bare skin. Aiden follows my cue and carefully touches the space, creating a tickling against my stomach.

I close my eyes. Take the finger between both hands. And I start pulling the digit up. Along the length of my abdomen. Slipping under my shirt. Covering up more of my skin.

“Wait, hold on.”

My eyes fly open, and the pain in my chest tightens. I look up to see Aiden’s brow is slightly furrowed. “You’re really tense. Are you okay, am I hurting you?”

“No!” I say quickly, plastering a reassuring smile on. “Not at all, I’m fine. Come on.” I try to pull his finger again but it holds firm.

“Is… something wrong, Eve?” He’s still frowning. Shit.

“No, really, I’m fine! Please. I want you…”

Trapped in a vortex of anxiety, I yank on the giant digit, try to press it against my breasts, anything to get his attention again. Anything to please him. But it has the opposite effect - Aiden pulls his hand away completely. My arms grasp at air for a second, and I shoot up into a seated position on the bed.

He settles his hand right next to the bed and leans in a bit closer to get a better look at me. His brow is still creased, he looks worried. “We don’t have to move so quickly. Clearly you’re uncomfortable, Evie. What’s up? Talk to me.”

Panic is blooming inside me, as much as I’m trying to maintain a calm facade. That quiet, more rational part of my brain is admonishing me. Of course it wouldn’t work with Aiden. He’s nothing like the ghost of my past. What was I expecting? But then the louder, more primal part of me is very insistent.

“I thought this might be part of your… fantasies?” I try, again forcing a smile. “Aren’t you into this?”

His frown deepens, each misguided attempt making things worse and worse. “I’m not into you forcing yourself,” he says plainly.

My hands have started shaking. Every alarm bell is ringing.

“Please… I’ll do anything," I say quietly.

“What do you mean? What’s wrong?"

“It’s not… Nothing’s wrong. I’m sorry, it’s fine. Please just let me–”

I slide off of the bed, reach out for his nearby fingers like it’s my salvation. But before I can reach him he pulls away again, sliding his hand all the way to the edge of the desk. This time when I look up at him, the worried expression also holds an edge of frustration.

"Stop,” he says, “I’m sorry, but… I’m not buying it. Not this time. Can’t you tell me what’s on your mind? Did I do something?”

I kneel there on the table, fidgeting as I sit back on my heels. I don’t know what to do. I’m not even sure how to begin talking about the complicated emotions swirling inside me. And there’s no way I can tell him why I’m feeling this way, he can’t know about all of those memories that I’ve been fighting all day. But right now, I’m ruining things. It feels like I’m on the edge of a precipice. As if everything’s about to fall apart. I’m not thinking straight, consumed by a fear of losing everything. Our relationship, my everyday life, the shelter and care that I so desperately need, it suddenly feels like it’s all in jeopardy.

“I’m sorry,” I gasp, my voice getting weaker by the second, “I’m sorry. Please, I don’t mean to be a problem… I can be better, I just… just… please let me… stay…”

“What? That’s what you’re worrying about right now?” His voice makes me flinch and I struggle to meet his gaze. There’s something in it that’s frightening me. “I don’t understand why this keeps coming up,” he says with growing agitation, “Are you really afraid I’ll kick you out? What, abandon you on the street, is that what you think?”

I shake my head desperately. “No! No, no, no… I… I know you wouldn’t. I know we’ve got this good thing going. Especially since you like me small like this, I didn’t mean–”

“Wait,” Aiden interrupts in a low voice. “What did you just say? Especially since I…"

What do I do, what do I do, what do I do.

With one shaky breath… I try. I try to share the thing that deep down has been such a source of anxiety for me since he first told me about his fantasies over a month ago.

“I guess I… Sometimes I wonder if you like me… or if you like the idea of me…”

“What?!” I cower at the raised volume, still struggling to look him in the eye. He’s hard to read - he looks confused, shocked, a whole slew of things. But right now, all I can interpret is… a look of disgust. A resentment for me accusing him of such a thing. A sense of betrayal for having taken information that he had been scared to tell me and turning it against him.

I furiously backpedal. “I don’t know, I don’t know! Forget I said anything. M-maybe I should just go to bed…”

The giant shakes his head, his tone more and more intent. “No, hold on, that’s important. We should talk about this!”

“It’s okay, that was stupid, I didn’t mean it. It felt dumb the second it left my mouth.” I look to his hand, resting a dozen feet away. I start crawling forward to reach it, employing as soothing a voice as I can, “Please, Aiden… Everything’s fine. Let’s just–"

And that’s when I can tell he’s clearly irritated. He pulls his hand right off the table before I can reach it, leaving emptiness in its wake. “I wish you’d stop that,” he growls, “Just stop… placating me all the time.”

“I’m not… I mean… I…”

It’s too much. I stare across the gap at his chest, so far from where I’m sitting near the edge of the desk. It’s hopeless. I can’t reach him, physically or otherwise. I’m too small… and too weak of a person.

I start to shut down. I kneel there, my facial features smoothing out as I stare into space. I feel numb. Aiden notices my shift in demeanor and moves his chair further back, so that he has the space to lean forward, lowering his face to try to pull in my gaze.

“Why don’t you want to talk?” he asks, “Do I scare you? Is that… Is that why you never want to ask me for help? Is the fact that I’m bigger still intimidating? Especially after some of what’s happened - like when I grabbed you, or the time I hit your head?” He’s gone back to sounding concerned, but there’s a tension underneath.

“No,” I say, my tone more detached now, “Those were accidents. We’ve learned from them. You’ve done nothing wrong.”

“Then why? Why won’t you lean on me more? Why won’t you just… just confide in me? Clearly I must have done something.”

“No, you haven’t.” I let my chin lower, looking past him. “I’m the problem. I’m always just… worrying you’ll eventually see me as a… burden…”

His frustration rushes right back in. “Well, stop! I’ll say it a hundred million times, you speaking out or needing help doesn’t bother me. You know what’s a burden? Never knowing what’s actually going on in your head every time you close up like this!”

My face lowers further and my eyes squeeze shut. No matter what my best efforts were… I’ve caused trouble for him after all. Figures. Being vulnerable with someone used to be the problem. And now not being vulnerable with someone is the problem. There’s no winning.

With a herculean effort, I keep tears from falling and look back up at Aiden, eyes shining. My tone is harsh with the tension in my body as I ask, “What do you want from me?”

He sighs heavily, looking pained. “I just want you to be honest. I want you to stop bottling up your feelings and just tell me when something’s bothering you…” He puts his face in his hands and I can practically hear him gritting his teeth. “God, Eve, you know every last dirty little secret about me. But I feel like half of the times you’ve opened up to me it’s because I’ve had to pry you open.”

“I’m not… I’m not hiding anything.” This is the first time I’m blatantly lying. I’m overstimulated and this is me lashing out, as useless as I know it is. Aiden lifts his head, and for several long seconds we’re at a stalemate. We glare at each other in silence, neither one of us knowing how to handle the pent-up emotions that the other has been suppressing for so long.

But even this is hopeless. I’m trying to stare down a man who’s as tall as a skyscraper. Who could obliterate me with zero effort if he wanted to. Of course he wouldn’t, but I don’t actually know what he’s capable of if pushed too far. There’s no way I’m not going to feel intimidated by the thinly veiled anger of the titan before me. And it’s not like I can walk away from this conversation either. I’m at his mercy and I know it.

Finally I cave. My scowl deepens and I choke out, “I don’t know… wh-what you want me to tell you…”

Aiden doesn’t say anything for several seconds. Out of nowhere, piercing the air like the sound of breaking glass, there’s a buzzing sound. The giant tsk’s with annoyance and pulls his phone out of his pocket, but he dismisses whatever it was trying to tell him, and the buzzing stops. I’m knocked off kilter from the distraction when he looks back at me and immediately speaks.

“Why don’t you want to go to the police?”

I go very still. Any anger that I was feeling completely vanishes. “W-what?” I stutter.

“Why are you so afraid of getting outside help?” he insists, not backing down in the slightest. “You’ve clammed up every time it’s come up. And you should’ve seen yourself after we ran into that police officer at the lab.” His eyebrows curve with concern. “Are you in some kind of trouble?”

“N-no!” I yelp, “I’m not… I mean… I’m not in… It’s not what you think…”

“I don’t know what to think!” Aiden’s hands are suddenly back on either side of me. He clearly isn’t sure whether touching me would be a good or bad thing right now, his fingertips hovering so close that I can feel their warmth. “Evie, whatever it is, you can trust me. Don’t you trust me by now?”

I shake my head, close to hyperventilating. I stare at the ground and say, “I can’t do this…”

“Why not?”

“You think you want to know… they always say they want to know, until…”

“Please. I’m begging you.”

No, no, not those words… I sit in terrified silence. Keeping my head down. Refusing to look at him.

“Just talk to me, goddamnit!” Aiden snaps. The massive hands that surround me land on the edge of the table, causing it to shudder and for me to almost lose balance. I gasp - he didn’t quite yell that, but it’s as close as he’s ever come. I whimper and cower and come no closer to looking at him, only curling in on myself further.

And then there’s the buzzing sound once more. It’s his phone again, receiving another call. He pulls his hands away, sighing with frustration.

“I need to take this real quick…” He takes his phone out again, swiping at it. He doesn’t manage to mask his tension as he answers, “Hey. Everything okay?”

I slowly raise my head with a small shard of curiosity, though my breath is still coming out ragged. This is accidentally providing me with a bit of a break. A welcome diversion. I can’t quite make out what the person on the other end is saying, but it’s a male voice, and rather loud. There seems to be a lot of commotion in the background too.

Aiden frowns, a new kind of annoyance blossoming. “Sorry but I told you earlier, I can’t tonight. Listen, man, this really isn’t a good time–” He falls silent as the other voice interrupts him and speaks for a while. “No, I hear you, um… Have you tried calling Steve? Or Moira? Wait, no, she’s sick… Okay, well you’ll just have to get an Uber or something, then, okay? I’m happy to pay for it if it helps. Happy birthday.”

The voice on the other end continues to insist and Aiden looks increasingly exasperated. I slowly get to my feet, and the motion is enough to catch the giant’s attention. “Go,” I mouth at him. His frown deepens, and just in case he didn’t understand, I speak out loud this time. “Go.”

He holds my gaze for a moment. “Hold on a sec,” he finally says, and he taps the mute button on his phone. “You really want me to leave right now?” he asks me, the hurt plain on his face. “Seriously?”

Despite the tears running down my cheeks, I manage one last calm sentence. “I think I need some space.”

Aiden’s jaw clenches and his eyes shine with tears of his own - I don’t know if they’re sad or angry ones - before he unmutes his phone. “Yeah, okay, fine. I’m heading over.” And without even looking at me, he gets up… and leaves the apartment. The door closes a bit more forcefully than usual, the sound reverberating like thunder until everything fades into unnerving stillness.

There had been no point in me standing up. I’ve collapsed right back onto my knees, and then my hands, and then I let my head fall onto the ground. The tears continue to fall, though I’m not quite crying. I don’t make a sound. I just hold very, very still as I slip into a state of unadulterated, mind-numbing fear.

~~*

I’m in a lush green forest, hardly noticing the chill in the air or the distant call of birds singing. I’ve been to these woods a couple of times, but we’ve never been this deep before. There’s no sign of even a path, much less any other people, just thick foliage as far as the eye can see.

My boyfriend, if I should still call him that, is on his knees in front of me. His hands are wrapped around my wrists, his head lowered with his brow leaned against my stomach. He’s shaking. Crying.

"Please,” he gasps, “I’ll be better… You have to believe me, I’ll change… Just please don’t do this. Please, I’m begging you…”

My face is covered in tears too. "Brock,” I say dejectedly, “I’ve heard that too many times. I always tell you that it’s fine, but… it’s not. We can’t keep doing this. We have to end it.”

His hands tighten their grip, squeezing me so hard it hurts. And then, in a blur of movement, he’s on his feet, suddenly looming over me. He reaches to his waistband and I gasp as he pulls out a handgun. He looks at me manically, his eyes wide as he puts the gun to his own temple.

"Then I’ll end it!” he yells, his cries echoing and halting all birdsong. “Is that what you fucking want?! To have another life on your conscience?! I’ll end it right here and now!”

I shouldn’t be surprised that he’s carrying some kind of firearm. But I’ve never seen him pull it out like this. No wonder he brought me so deep into the woods. My heart is racing and my mouth opens but no sound comes out.

Brock steps closer, looking crazed as he breathes hard. "And then? What are you going to do without me? Think about it for two seconds. You have no money. No schooling. No skills to offer other than, what – fucking waitressing?” He takes another step, coming alarmingly close, his face inches away from mine. “And what about your mother’s death? Forgot that little detail, did you, darling? Do you really think anyone will believe you if I’m not there to defend you? You think they wouldn’t have hauled you off in handcuffs the first chance they had?!”

I’m afraid to make sudden movements but I can’t help taking a step back, and I feel my shoulders hit a tree. Dizzily I begin crumbling to the forest floor, collapsing into a seat. I lower my head submissively, trembling from head to toe. I can’t face him. I don’t know what he’s capable of anymore. My only option is to wait. Wait… and then run. Just have to get past this.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Brock’s arm drop back down. With much more calm, he puts the gun back into its holster, and then he crouches in front of me. I hold my breath, unable to look at him as he puts his hand to my cheek.

"Never forget that,” he says icily, the cold composure filling me with even more dread than when he was yelling. “Without my testimony you’re nothing. You’ve got no future. Come on, baby… don’t you get it?”

His hand moves to my chin now. His fingertips press against my jaw as he forces me to look up at him.

“You. Need. Me.”

~~*

I have no idea how much time has passed. I’m just collapsed on the desk for hours on end. I have nowhere to run to. No choices at my disposal. It gets darker and darker around me as the setting sun gives way to the night, but I don’t get up to turn the desk lamp on. I just sit there in a heap. Frozen. Paralyzed.

Until I hear a sound. I’m not even sure what I’ll do when I see Aiden again, I haven’t thought through anything at all. But that’s not what I’m worrying about right now. I can tell even before the door opens that he’s not alone.

Operating on pure instinct, I skitter backwards as the key goes into the lock and then I see the silhouette of some monstrous shape that lumbers into the room. I hide behind my bed, peeking over it to realize that my roommate is there, yes, but there’s someone else who’s slumped onto him, one arm draped over his shoulders. And… the other person is huge. I’m not just talking normal levels of huge in comparison to my three inch frame. He looks to be a head taller than Aiden and nearly twice as broad. I duck down behind the bed again, not daring to look any longer.

I hear the two men stumble further in, grunting with effort. Then I jump at the booming sound of the stranger’s voice.

“Oh yeaaaah! I forgot you had a washer an’ dryerrr,” he says, slurring his words, “You ‘member when I’d mooch off of you last year, bro? When our washer broke? Good tiiiimes.”

“Yes, I remember,” Aiden’s voice is both very tired and clearly on the brink of his patience. “Oh, come on, Diego!”

There’s a loud, resounding thump as I guess that the new guy has just fallen to his knees. “I jus’… restin’ for a sec…”

The more familiar giant sighs. “Okay, just… don’t move. I’ll go change the sheets on the bed and help you in. Just stay here.”

“Mmkaaaay. Thanks for lettin’ me staaaay.”

“Don’t mention it. Please.”

There’s the sound of footsteps and I can’t help stealing another glance, this time from past the side of the bed. Sure enough, I can only see the drooped form of this unfamiliar behemoth in the living room now. I quickly hide again - he’s closer than I realized.

There’s a brief shuffling near the couch, I think he’s messing with a cushion or something. And then there’s more noise… it sounds like he’s getting to his feet… and the single thing I was most afraid of happens. He’s shambling towards the desk.

I have to hold a hand over my mouth to keep from crying out at a sudden, brief earthquake that would have knocked me over if I was standing. I don’t know if the titan has kicked the desk or hit an elbow on it or what. But clearly he was drawn to whatever tiny odd things he noticed sitting on the table’s surface, visible even in just the dim light of the street lamps outside. I can hear his breathing and catch the smell of booze, the proximity absolutely terrifying. There isn’t really space for me to get underneath my bed, but I crouch down and press myself up against my hiding spot as I hold as still as I possibly can.

Diego seems to chuckle with amusement and I hear something fall over less than a dozen feet away - one of my clothing shelves, I think. Aiden, where are you? I wonder desperately.

No sooner do I have that thought when out of nowhere I’m knocked backwards. I wince involuntarily from falling onto my butt and then watch in horror as my bed is lifted up into the sky. My breath comes in shallow as I take in the scale of this monster of a man. I can’t be much taller than his pinky finger.

I don’t know if it was the sound that I made or if he’d already realized I was there, but… he’s looking at me. There’s no avoiding it, our eyes have met and his are widening with shock. I’ve been discovered. By a very large and very inebriated giant.

Diego blinks a couple of times and wavers slightly on the spot from his kneeled position. Finally he thunders, “What the fuck?” and his free hand is reaching for me, quickly taking up more and more of my vision. I can’t process the nightmare. The built up stress has turned me into a wreck and I’m not in control of my body when I fly into a full-on panic. I scream.

[Olo]

@littlest-lily Oh shit.

Putting the Diego development aside, I admire your narration of the fight very much. Every beat was earned, the dialogue (spoken and internal) was pitch-perfect, and best of all both Evie and Aiden were wholly sympathetic. They were both right, every step of the way.

The Brock exposition was terrifying and all-too-plausible.

I don’t know what to say about Aiden’s decision to bring Diego home, smdh.

[miss-lillipants]

Wow, intense chapter. The emotions and anxiety are so well written, as always.

Let’s hope Diego is easily swayed in his current state.

[Olo]

@miss-lillipants Some drunks see pink elephants, Diego sees nerd fairies.

[miss-lillipants]

@Olo hopefully he’s like me and either forgets, or is left with such hangxiety that he wishes he could forget

[littlest-lily]

@Olo Ahhh, thank you for helping me have a little sigh of relief. The goal was being able to understand where either person might be coming from, so I’m so glad that seemed to land okay as everything came to a head.

[littlest-lily]

@miss-lillipants Thank you so much!! And yes… let’s hope

[Olo]

@littlest-lily It’s always frustrating to watch two people have an unnecessary fight because one or both of them misinterprets something the other has said or done. That wasn’t the case here. Some fights are necessary.